Over the past week I've received feedback in different forms that I'm putting on weight... from colleagues and students as well.
This journal has faithfully tracked the many failures in the past... I really hope that this will be the last time I'm saying this.
I resolve to shape up... if not when the time comes for wedding photoshoot (like, 3 more months to go or so? Oh no...), I'll look like fishball stuck to a watermelon... :(
I just realised that the gym that's less than two minutes from where I stay now (if I walk fast) is open for my usage. Must carve out a routine once again.
I'm currently at my school's tennis courts at half past seven in the evening... connected to the school's wireless internet! Mmm I know this sounds pretty duh... but this is the first time I actually felt the "borderless connectivity", not that there wasn't any in other parts of the school or the boarding school... it's just.. it's in the open and my laptop's accommodating some uninvited winged guests and all... Haha.
Brought the other group of boarders for their third beginner's tennis lesson... was thinking that instead of bringing a book to read I could do some reflections and writing on the laptop.
Ever since entering the boarding programme, I seem to find my work and personal life getting more blurred, not that it hasn't been... Not that it isn't good, for I do enjoy spending time with the boys and all... but I realised that such an arrangement's wreaking little havocs.. in that all my other schedules are affected. Well well...
The youths in church for one... reality hit me on Sunday when I met them here and there during our church's anniversary service and subsequently dinner. There was a time I was very involved... a time when I remembered I spent practically most of my time with the youths in the ministry.
Time with family and Char...well. Arrangement has been made for me to take time off on Wednesdays so Char and I could spend some time going out together in the evenings... then there are weeks (like this week) when I'm required to be around... well.
Time with God... well.
Speaking of which, I shall spend the next hour to do just that.
I received today in my inbox a weekly devotional/commentary which God used to speak through.
He has used... and has been using my life's experiences working with youths (first in youth ministry and now back in school) to show me how He really really loves me.
Children have the power to transform us in a variety of ways. They enhance our sense of vulnerability, and so they may incline us toward greater dependence on God. Knowing that in our children our stake in the well-being of this planet extends beyond the years of our own lives may provoke a greater sense of responsibility about the environment. And of course, child rearing is an excellent school for learning virtues like patience and self-control. (Roberts, Taking The Word to Heart, 223)
There're so many times the heart has ached... patience and self-control indeed.
[People were bringing little children to Jesus for him to place his hands on them, but the disciples rebuked them. When Jesus saw this, he was indignant. He said to them, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these. Truly I tell you, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it." And he took the children in his arms, placed his hands on them and blessed them. TNIV]
In this incident Jesus's disciples acted as bouncers, preventing the little children from being brought to Jesus. In doing so the disciples were merely reflecting the values of the day. "In the ancient world, children had no status. They were easily ignored and barred access because no one would take the trouble to complain and fight for them" (David E. Garland, Mark, Grand Rapids: Zondervan, 1996, 381-382).
By his anger, Jesus reveals His heart and reveals what God really thinks of children. God values children and does not see them as second class to adults. (Is this aspect of God's heart reflected in our churches?) There is nothing here about children being more innocent than adults. All of us who have had to raise children know that original sin manifests itself early. What
is highlighted is the children's powerlessness. It is their powerlessness that enables them to receive the blessings of God.
Deep down all of us long to be held by Abba Father and to be blessed by Him. As we carry our children and bless them we are reminded that we have a heavenly Father who wants to carry us and bless us. If we eliminate children from our lives, we lose this sacramental reminder of how much God loves us.
I hope all these years of training would allow me to be a father that He's called me to be in the future... when the time comes. Hur. :)
And in the meantime, I know there will be times I will have to contend with recalcitrant irresponsible behaviour... and habits that some really can do without.
Like how Pa has always done so for me, disciplining, nudging...
Peace in the midst of chaos and uncertainties.
Joy as the birthright of a Christian.
Love... from the Source.
This is what we call... blessedness. Eh. Sounds like the title of a song. Hahahaha...
I'm currently on the bus on the way to Joo Chiat... then we go eh, didn't Galvin just mentioned that he's finished his course? Haha... yeah. I missed two lessons a couple of months ago due to my work trip to Sydney, and so here I am going for make up lessons. I was so looking forward to a time to rest over this weekend and spending a little more time with Char... when Char fetched me home yesterday after work and told me about my lesson today (she tracked my google calendar) I let out a few disgruntled grunts... I forgot that the lesson's today. :|
Haha... anyways. Was a tiring day yesterday - co-organised a parent-teacher gathering for the cohort which I'm coordinating in school. There was so much admin involved, so many things to prepare beforehand... and during the event itself, the need to manage the helpers on top of meeting parents... then the clearing up.
Thankful for my bunch of wonderful student helpers (mostly the boarders) who managed themselves so much so I felt confident enough to let them be while I sat at my designated spot to meet parents. The gathering dragged for some time though - think quite a number of them grew a bit restless towards the end and were a little disgruntled... well well. Went for supper with some of them before heading back to finish some laundry... before Char came to pick me up.
It was a heartening experience interacting more with parents, to hear of their concerns for their sons and to think of the prospective opportunities to work with them in the future. I'm in a really unique position in my workplace though sometimes it may get a little weary having to be the in-between amongst the boys, their parents and the teachers. Have received feedback from the staff side that some weren't exactly pleased with the way the gathering was planned... well, I guess there's no one situation where all parties can be truly pleased... all I know is that I've tried my best to take all things into consideration.
Haha... yeah. It's a joy to see the boys in auto mode and settling the various venues, helping one another out and ensuring that the venues were ready and that they were put back in their proper places after the event. If anyone of you ever drops by... really appreciate the help rendered. (:
The past couple of hours were spent trying to get a few pieces of clothing ironed in between futile attempts at getting msn to work and work itself. Prior to that, I was doing a little bit of unwinding with Char at Vivocity, catching a breather over dinner and a movie... we caught "Meet Dave".
It's a joy to hear her laughter... the lightness of it. I must continue to work to make my deardear laugh amidst all the stress and work that's piling up for the both of us. Haha yeah. Her students are giving her a run of her energies.. when she's already been drained and sick these days. And my current schedules aren't helping much - we're practically stretched in terms of schedules... and sometimes when I'm done with what I have to do, it would have been her bed time already. The nature of my current job as a boarding master is as such - sometimes my work extends into rather late nights.
Which is why I'm thankful for the weekly "no compromise" day when we'll both spend the evening together.. something that we started quite a long time back, when we both still had quite a bit of time together each week. Have been missing a week or two of it over the past weeks due to prior arranged appointments... This was probably the first proper evening when we could spend some time together... still it seemed short.
I'm not sure how we can successfully maneuvre through this season of time... but I do know that Pa's in charge.
Thank you dear for being so patient with me.. for the sacrifices you made... simply because you chose to love me. I will continue to jiayou so that I won't forever remain as your lau pok wllg. Remember to drink more water at work k... and just do as Pa would ba. Praying for you... wdwllp...WAN! HAHAN! :D
It's been sometimes since I blogged an entry... lots happened over the past two weeks or so... guess the best is to let the pictures do the talking with me interspersing a couple of words here and there:
Finally took some pictures of Covenant Evangelical Free Church's Woodlands premises.. where Char and I would be holding our solemnisation and reception next May. Yet to confirm cause I've yet to do up the documentations... which reminds me, I should be doing it real soon! Haha... it's amazing to think of it still - the first time I stepped into compounds on 3rd August, my jaw dropped when I saw that the chairs at the fellowship area are in orange and green... exactly the colours we chose as our wedding theme! Haha... yeah. It'll take some time to get used to the place first though - have grown to have the familiarity with the Bukit Panjang compounds which exude a more homely feeling... but yeah, this new one looks really cool I must admit! (: Haha... ultimately, it's really not about the buildings or how well they look... nothing beats God's presence. Where two or three are gathered in His name, there He is. :)
Keepying and Kaijie are two pals I made through ECCube, my high school's computer club. Some pretty fond memories we shared together... like how we visited the zoo and night safari for our project.. which eventually won us the accolade of being the first local secondary school to win a particular international competition. One went on to a poly and another to another jc... we kept in touch here and there - met with them individually in the past. Ten years passed... and we finally met together once more as a group. Had dinner at poolside, a place where we never went to while we were here as students. Brought them on a little night tour of the school... and as we reached Kah Kee Hall, Kaijie paused and had the expression of being overwhelmed that he's back in school once again.
Haha... I wonder if the current batches would have such feelings of nostalgia, of good memories ten, twenty years down the road. The Chinese High has been a special place... not the academic competitiveness, not the teachers' lectures... more so the people, the friends, the day to day experiences. I guess that did play a part in me choosing to be back bah. :)
Hahah oh oh... the graduate diploma phase of my professional counselling course has officially ended. (: In all, one high distinction and four distinctions for all assignments and final exam... with a commendation for practicum. Wouldn't have been possible if not for Pa's sustenance and grace... and Char's constant encouragement... and Gpp's prayers. :P This course really helped in allowing me to be equipped with practical skills to help the boys... but with all the mad schedules, I have to defer the masters phase for probably two semesters. Of course, I really won't know how Pa will lead in the months to come... there's a time to plan... and also a time to trust. We'll see how. :)
My dear sister has graduated from her Diploma in Multimedia course at Nanyang Academy of Fine Arts!! She looks good in her grad gown man!! :D Haha... It's been a journey for her.. and I'm just glad that she pulled through - talk about strength and resilience. :) And yeah, glad to bump into Ah Hao, my first mentee of sorts whom I have not met for a VERY LONG TIME. Haha... fond memories, that man shall not live on bread alone but by the Word of God... Haha.
If you're reading this bro... I do hope that I'll get to see you more often in the future. ;)
Attended the school's chinese drama production last Saturday after dinner with Dori and dad... Kudos for a job well done! Enjoyed all the six mini-plays. Great to see so many familiar faces in the plays! :)
It's been three weeks since the boarding programme started... I've grown to see my cluster as 'family' though I would think not all of them would think that way. At the back of my mind I know that some of them would most probably leave after the 'try out' period, probably not because the programme's not good, but just because they would find the full length of stay too long. Well... in any case, I'll just have to make use of whatever time there is to get to know them better. This bunch of boys have been amazing and the most disciplined - something that I really didn't expect. Toilets are always kept clean, rooms are all generally well kept.. have yet to do a spot check this week though... shall do it soon. Heh heh heh....
And yeah, some of them have begun their tennis lessons which they'd opted for as part of the boarding programme. I'm supervising one group... they were having so much fun they got carried away with time on the first day. Haha... in any case, there were conflicting feelings then - was really glad to see them having fun and gelling together in that sense... yet on the other hand it wasn't right to drag beyond the lesson time as the coach and the lifeguard who manages the lightings of the court have to call it a day. It was a good opportunity to observe the level of discipline in each of the participants though! Haha...
Alright... guess I'll take a little rest for now. There're quite a number of pressing matters to settle at work later on - preparing for the parent-teacher gathering on Friday, settling next term's timetables and venues, fixing and sprucing a portal that I'd set up...
Sometimes I do wonder about the people dropping by this place...
I wonder if there are people who've been around catching up with my life... both who know me in person and those who don't... but never did leave any form of a marking here.
Perhaps leave a comment on this entry? Just knowing that you're around is a huge encouragement in itself.
Understanding God's greatness puts things in perspectives, that we are really but nothing apart from God. I know I have a BIG God who chose to become small, coming down to earth in the form of a human being because He loves really big.
Mentor's response: A beautiful paradox Galvin is that the closer we get to the Lord, the smaller we become and the greater He becomes to us. It's like seeing a mountain in the distance...to experience it we must get closer, and the closer we get, the more formidable it becomes...so much so that it blocks everything else out. Is God so encompassing in your life that He surrounds your all?
Nothing's new... just one of those days when I feel my inadequacies and weaknesses creeping up on me again.
There're many initiatives and things that I would really like to implement and spearhead at my workplace for the benefit of the boys... but in the end the ideas always seem daunting, especially when huge portions of the ideas call for my stepping out of my comfort zones time and again.
I'm not a natural leader... speaker... communicator. There're so many times I feel like a Moses in need for an Aaron.
Then again, I'm reminded in my personal devotion today that if my God is big, then my problems would be small. Likewise... small God, big problems.
My weaknesses and inadequacies are things that I would lift up to Him day after day... and for every single victory whereby His power and strength makes manifestations in my life, I give thanks.
My God! Is Big! So strong! So mighty! Yeah yeah! Hahaha... never did get into that song by Planet Shakers years ago when I first heard of it... it's ironic that as I grow older, I began to see the relevance of the lyrics... and what seems like a youthy simple song.
Alright... time for a quick shower. Catching up with two secondary school friends whom I've not met for a really long time later over dinner! :)
The CSE Boarding Programme officially started exactly a week ago on the third of August. It was kind of a mad rush... rushed to collect birthday cake to celebrate Weilun and Jordy's birthdays, then Char suggested that we get some food and drinks for the boys for cluster discussion time... ended up cabbing to boarding school full of stuff.
Welcome briefing... welcome dinner... and soon everyone settled down and started studying for their coming tests.
This is definitely a new phase of life for me... a transition that I have chosen to take, and with it comes a number of changes, a shift in certain priorities, etc. In a way or two, work is no longer a "nine to five" - my schedules have to be relooked into... sacrifices have to be made.
I'm thankful though to be given this opportunity to get to know these thirty plus of them better (hopefully)... and more so the twelve under my care.
The boys have been exceptionally disciplined and well behaved for the first week - the showers were cleared after usage, rooms kept reasonably clean and tidy... they left for school early, studied when it's time to during study period... everything went rather well... then I caught one of them playing dota during study period.
I didn't know why I had such a strong reaction then. Perhaps it would have been better if he would acknowledge his mistake instead of just giving all sorts of excuses... but I guess I took it a little personally because I chose to give all of them the trust that they'd do things at the right times.
I know deep down he's a good boy, just like a number of others who appear not to be on the surface... well.
IDT (Intentional Discipleship Training) on Friday evening touched upon mentoring, in which many trinkets of knowledge and experience were shared. Pastor KK shared about how he and Pastor Ed played and worked together when they first started their mentoring relationship some twenty years back.. how effective mentoring comes forth by first building the relationship. Joshua and Matt subsequently went up to share a bit about their best practices when it comes to mentoring pre-teens and teens.
Joshua talked about earning the right to speak into their lives; Matt talked about the acronym YOU.T.H - whereby the "YOU" represents the genuineness one gives to them, just being who you are when you're with them, not putting on a facade in front of them when you're actually another person elsewhere... "T" stands for Training, training them in skills and values, that they may grow up with these skills and values ingrained in them... and "H" stands for Him. In the context of Christian mentoring, he meant pointing the youths to God... and whereas I can't freely do so at work, the next best thing I could and should do would be to lift them up to God in prayer and trust that God would watch over them and protect them even as they grow up and venture into new territories.
I don't know how many of these boys and the batches to come would grow up to fit the mold of being one who'd work his buttocks off for money and appear successful at work... then spend half the money on clubbing, cigarettes and alcohol just to give himself highs simply because life's never seem so empty and low and because he doesn't know what he's living for.
What I do know... is that between now and then, it matters... a whole lot.
Let's see how it'll all go bah. (: It's late... I better get some rest when I'm given the opportunity to do so... so yeah. Adios!
wow. good reflection. remembering that God is the centre of all commitments. it's tough to balance life but balance is indeed the key to life. but its good that you know where you lack in so that you can focus in that area to improve it. your blog is encouraging.
gpp: (: (: (:
1d19: Haha... thx for dropping by ;)
mei: LOL there can only be one dorodori... =)
gary: heyy.. it's encouraging somehow to know that there're people who've been around... I'm in a rather busy season, but I really hope it wouldn't mean the stoppage of entries - will keep on writing! ;)
ah hao: YO! Haha... really glad to have met up after all these years!! See you around more often k!
27 Aug 08 (Wed) @ 11:15 PM in 
