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It's not that I have nothing to write... but the devos these few days have been especially meaningful... got to share. :)

This devotional was written by Kelly McFadden

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.
- Hebrews 12:1-3

In college, a group of us decided we would go sky diving. All we needed to do was show up in the morning, sign a stack of paperwork accepting responsibility for our actions, watch a 30-minute instructional video, go through a few safety rules with an instructor, and, we would be up in the air and jumping out of a plane within an hour.

Everything went as planned, and by the early afternoon, I was in a plane with a professional sky diver attached to me like a backpack. It is called a tandem jump. Our turn came and out of the plane we went. It was amazing. Never have I had a better view of the Rocky Mountains or a better flight. As we plummeted towards the ground, the time came to pull the parachute. The rip chord was pulled and we immediately went from falling fast to floating slowly to our landing.

There are times in our lives when we start feeling out of control, plummeting quicker and quicker into sin, temptation and trouble. The key is, when you get out of control in your life, make sure you have others around you who can pull your rip chord. It can be hard sometimes to see the red flags in our own lives. In the Old Testament, the Lord sent judges to remind the people to turn from their evil ways. In the New Testament, Jesus comes and tells us to slow down and focus on what is real and important. He then trains His disciples to share His message with the rest of the world. What a gift the Lord gave us in putting other people in our lives who can not only walk with us, but guide us.

Who are you attached to? When you start falling, do you have people around you who can help slow you down and pick you up? Or do you have people in your life who simply aid you in falling further and faster until you hit rock bottom? Your choice of who accompanies you in life’s journey can make all the difference in the world!

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This devotional was written by Mike DeVries

Then the man and his wife heard the sound of the LORD God as he was walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and they hid from the LORD God among the trees of the garden. But the LORD God called to the man, "Where are you?" - Genesis 3:8-9

In the Scripture passage above, God's question strikes me as odd.

"Where are you?"

Is God truly at a loss to find the man and his wife? Is He walking in the garden thinking, "Now where are they? They hid so well. I hate it when they do this!" Is this what is going on, or is there something so much larger being said here?

The opening chapters of the book of Genesis poetically paint for us the picture of how the world we know came into being and why that world is the way it is. In other words, in the midst of the words and the drama, it answers the larger questions of life: Why are we here? Why is life the way it is?

Genesis 3 tells the story of a choice and the ramifications of that choice. God tells the first humans that they can eat of any tree in the garden, except of the fruit of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. In essence, God lays before the first humans a choice: Do you want to live the way I created you to live, fully alive and fully connected to your Creator? Or, do you want to live the way that you feel is best? It's a choice that not only faced the first human beings, but has faced every human being since then.

What we find is that the first humans chose to live the way they wanted to live, and the ramifications were immense. Their relationship with their Creator was damaged. Their relationship with one another and creation was damaged. When they heard the sound of God in the garden, they did the first thing that came to mind - they hid.

Does it really work to hide from God? Can we really find places to hide where God is not, or where God cannot see the state of our lives? Have we really fooled God?

God calls out to the man, "Where are you?" This is not so much a statement about God's inability to find the man, but is more about the nature of who God is. God is a lover... and a searcher. God is about searching for that which needs to be healed and mended. This is the picture that is being painted for the reader.

So next time you feel the urge to hide, thinking that God will never find you (and that this is better than being found out by Him), just remember that our lives are already completely laid bare before the eyes of Him who loves and searches us out. He loves you just the way you are... just as you are.

"Where are you?"

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The only two words that transpired after a relatively long walk.

"Then Jesus said to his disciples, "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will find it." - Matthew 16:24-25

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I look forward to tuesday evenings as well. :P

Markudesu must had found it amusing when I called him at five and asked him where to he got the sun-dried tomatoes that he used for his pasta the previous time round.

"I got it from France."

Diao diao diao... Heh.

But yea. We managed to get all the ingredients for the pesto pasta... and made it. :P

I love pine nuts! I love pesto sauce! I love... !

Hur hur hur.

(learning new skills)

Over the past week I've contemplated picking up some new skills as I step into the next quarter of my life on this side of eternity... We all know that learning is a never ending journey, but somehow the inertia to pick up something new grows bigger as one ages...

Well. Shall see how it goes. :)

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I look forward to monday afternoons this season in time.

Because I know He'll not fail to send me encouragements through the way this brother is growing... and is yearning to grow.

He draws near to all who yearn to draw close to Him.

Counsellor, guide, friend, strength, shield... gives directions, love, hope... that's who He is.

And He's so near and yet so far to many... many who are searching but not recognising.

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"If you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any fellowship with the Spirit, if any tenderness and compasssion, then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose. Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.

Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus: Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasp, but made himself nothing, taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself and become obedient to death - even death on a cross!

Therefore God exalted him to the highest place and gave him the name that is above every name, that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, for the glory of God the Father." - Philippians 2:1-11

(myriad)

I was confronted with the question today while reading through the youth edition of "Experiencing God"... if I could observe the greatest commandment of loving Him with all my heart, soul and mind.

I don't know if this is what brokenness looks like... and as though as He's prepping me for this confrontation, the song which I wrote entitled "I Love You" came forth in my player this morning on the way to work, where the chorus loops an endless "I love You"s...

Because I know I've lost the innocence like that of a new born child when I was born again five years ago.

And yet at the same time, the depths of His grace seem to deepen year after year, revelation upon revelation as I come to know how utterly undeserving I am as a fallible being to be adopted once again to be His child.

I had the opportunity to go through the online version of the four spiritual laws with a youth the day before... and he got stuck at the point where he had to choose between leading a self-directed life or a God-directed life.

The knowledge that he may not be able to be in charge of his own life anymore seem a little bit too confounding and overwhelming.

But if he believes that he has a God who loves him and is for him and will direct his ways in the best of ways, then I guess it wouldn't be too hard of a decision to make.

There lies the dilemma... to know that experiencing God brings about the conviction and yearning to follow Him, and yet one requires obedience to Him first and foremost for that experience to occur.

And this morning when I walked to take the bus... it dawned upon me again at how much grace He's lavished upon me for the very fact that it didn't take too much of a trouble for me to believe in Him in the beginning.

Had a good chat with my ex-chemistry teacher... she read about my family's journey through the past years and talked briefly about hers... and in the end she said that it's good that I didn't walk out on God.

And all I can think of is... how can I ever... for what He's given so freely?

"Everything in your Christian life, everything about knowing and experiencing God, everything about knowing His will, depends on the quality of your love relationship with Him. If that is not right, nothing in your life will be right." - Henry Blackaby in Experiencing God (youth edition)

And all I know... is that I can't love Him with all my heart, soul and mind as long as I'm here... but I want to... and that He can.

And I know He holds my hand.

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Aunty Beano and the little children from the sunbeam (pre primary to pre teen) ministry anchored the main services today.

I had to pause at almost every song during the praise and worship segment... so powerful. Not in the music... not in the presentation... it's just... so powerful.

And the message by Joshua too.

And isn't it true that parents nowadays leave the discipling of their children in the hands of the church?

If only they learn how to pray for and with them, celebrate them... model their love for God for them... help them grow in their personal relationship with Him...

That is why so many grow up with warped theology... and end up as jaded christians, being so filled up in the mind about the faith but never really touching the essence of the abundant life that can only be accessed through the living and exciting relationship with our Maker.

To the christian parent - discipleship starts at home, not in the church. The goal is to see your child living a transformed life, and more often than not it starts when your child sees you living a transformed life. The reading of the Word, prayer... all these have to be modeled upon.

To the christian youth - do you know Jesus... or do you just know about Him? Do you interact with your friends in the light of who you are in Him... or do you consciously suppress that identity in an effort to appear more "hip" and "cool", thinking that holiness is actually boring and dull? Do you know... that you possess the power to know Him so very intimately if you so choose to and then realise that it's actually a very exciting walk?

To the non christian youth - do you know that you stand a much higher chance of growing a really initimate relationship with Jesus as compared to those who've grown up all their lives as christians? That is because you own that decision when you choose to believe and you start that journey with no one else... but you and Him.

And the question will always be... will you?

Jesus loves me this I know
For the Bible tells me so
Little ones to Him belong
They are weak but He is strong

Yes, Jesus loves me
Yes, Jesus loves me
Yes, Jesus loves me
The Bible tells me so...

I'll hope that my children, whenever that will be, that they will be able to sing these lines knowing what they really mean.

And I also hope that you, yes, you, if it hasn't, that the day will come for those words to resonate in your heart as well, and letting that love does its transformative work.

(a belated dinner)

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The weather was just fine... the sea breeze cooling. Wooo. :P

It was a great evening and night at Rasa Sentosa attending Wern and Lynn's wedding solemnisation and dinner... great night spent with great friends... and well, the 6 of us finally got our triple date - attending a wedding. Hahahaha... sMonSter and Markudesu were all over the place though as helpers and bouncers (boink boink boink...), so we didn't really get to sit down as 3 couples most of the time... but it was great that we're placed at the same table. Heh. Food was sumptuous!!! Got my favourite ORH NEE!!! :D

I welled when Wern presented gifts to his parents and spoke those words to them... and when his mom went over to place her face over his and Lynn's after the signing of the matrimony, I started wondering in my mind how it will be like when the time comes.

I don't know what God has in stall.

I don't know how He gave mom such confidence in the past to postpone our baptism, to say that on the day we baptise my sis' leukemia would have been cured... and it came to pass in the form of an email from my sis' doctor the day before we were scheduled to be baptised... that her cancerous cells had dropped all the way to 0%.

I don't know if I have that faith and confidence to say that on the day of my wedding, I will see my mom standing and giving a speech to all who are present.

All present indicators seem to show that it is quite impossible that mom will be able to stand up and support herself... her current unwillingness to open her mouth makes it hard to forsee any progress in speech rendering.

But I'll keep on hoping... and remember who He is.

You are the God of the impossible. Let Your will be done... and if it is, let it come to pass... that very day.

NO GREATER LOVE
by Rachel Lampa

Before I knew your name
You knew my every breath
Before I found my way
You knew my every step
Before I knew everything that I need
You gave it all to me

No greater love than this
That you should lay down your life
For someone such as me
I'd spend a life time wondering why
The beauty of heaven is here in my heart
And I know there can be
No greater love
Than this

I never understood
How mercifull love could be
Until I felt His flame
Light every part of me
And I would give everything that I am
Cause I have been saved
Yes I have been saved

No greater love than this
That you should lay down your life
For someone such as me
I spend a life time wondering why
The beauty of heaven is here in my heart
And I know there can be
No greater love

The beauty of heaven is here in my heart
And I know there can be
No greater love
For someone such as me
No greater love
Than this

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(frivolous request)

Tag people! Hahaha.. yeah. If you're reading this, leave a tag to say hi yea? :)

(inertia)

It's one of those days where I woke up to a very huge inertia to work.

One of those days where you gobble up everything that's in your sight.

Pretty bad... because I'm going to attend a wedding later on. Hahahaha...

Ah well.

The once-in-a-while frivolous entry. :P

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Are you a believer of Christ about to take your all important end of year exams? If you are, and if the prayer below reflects what you'll want to say to your heavenly Daddy, you are invited to use it as a prayer unto Him... you don't have to say it word by word though - it's just a guideline - remember that there're no formulas to praying... you don't hold up a script in your hand when you talk to your friends, do you? :)

Dear Heavenly Father,

Thank You for the love You have for me that endures forever, and for the faithfulness that You have shown throughout my life.

As the days draw near towards the all important exams, Father I pray that You will draw me even closer to You, to know that You are the God who brings me through it all.

All the stresses and pressure to achieve or even to pass the papers can get a little bit daunting at times... Father I pray for strength not of myself but from You, to know that You will sustain me even as I revise my work.

Teach me to commit the results into Your hands, to know that my worth as a person is not in the results that I will get, but wholly in You alone. Lord I pray for Your will to be done, not Your will for me... but Your will alone, not asking that You bless me with disctinctions... but for the results that You have purposed.

Teach me day after day to know that it's not the results that matter but it is the attitude that I am putting in that testifies. Lord I acknowledge that it is very easy for me to succumb to peer pressure, but I also know that Holy Spirit You are in me to guide me and rise above the temptations to simply follow along.

Grant me wisdom in the way I uphold myself as Your child... so that others may see the difference. Above all, grant me closeness to You, that I may continually commit everything into Your hands.

In Jesus' most precious name.

Amen.

Yea... I guess most people will think that when we pray, we pray for the best situation to happen in our perspective, and for that I can think of scenarios such as getting straight As, getting exemptions for exams, hitting the jackpot, finding money on the floor... you get the drift.

It's only when we realise that this life we're living... that it's not our own... that we're stewards of it and that the One who really owns it is Him... then perhaps we may see things in a slightly different light... okay, not slightly. :P

And I have to admit that it takes time... and that's why when I look at youths who've seen it in this light my heart melts. Heh heh...

To Jan, Peter, 7, 5, Teck Liang, Grace, Clarice, Kel Hor, MichCheow, David Lum, John, Ian and everyone else taking their 'A', 'O' and 'N' Levels: All the best people!! :)

To JJ taking his 'O' CL1 papers: Jiayou xiao di! ;)

To Zeb, David, Chris, Amos, JonL, Jerome, 6, 2 and everyone else taking their end of year exams and promos: For Him okay? :)

To Chongwe, Chongyee, Shaojie, Yuanfeng, Juan Lih, Yingcong, Alwyn, Chuanyu, Ray, Jerry, Donovan, Alanson, Nicholas, Bryan, Alex, Julian, Sean, Cheong Keat, JonFoo, Nickee, Keith, Jeff, Gordon, Jiasheng, Zhenyang, Zikang, Ziheng, Huiyao, Ryan, Dommi, Timtam, Tim Ng, Yangcheng... and everyone else whom I've taught before: All the best for the coming end of years!!

(hur hur...)

I did it this morning! YAY!!!! Hahahaha...

(how it resonates)

"If my life is motivated by an ambition to leave a legacy, what I would probably leave is a legacy of ambition. But, if my life is motivated by the power of God's spirit in me and the awareness of the indwelling Christ, if I allow his presence to guide my motives, that's the only time I think we have a great legacy." - Rich Mullins (October 21, 1955 - September 19, 1997)

In a world where most people live as if they have to achieve the final fulfillment and satisfaction of their human lives before they die, the Christian message sounds as bold today as it did to those who first heard it. Yet all around us is the murmuring that there is something different about this good teacher; He speaks as one with authority. And his influence echoes a promise that has not been forsaken: "Lo, I am with you always, even to the end of the age" (Matthew 28:20). - Jill Carattini

(am I THAT unapproachable... :|)

Today a lot of students siam me at the bus stop... or they saw me and didn't say anything. Hais... 8|

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Hahaha...

Sleeping early today. Hope to wake up early to kickstart something that I've been pushing time and again... I want to better my timing this december... better by one second also can. Haha.

Finished Wern and Lynn's photo presentation for their all important day this saturday:

Still got a lot of backlogged work to complete actually... but guess I'll take things one at a go. I don't care. I'll have to do it in the morning. Haha...

Last two classes today officially... well.

Heard this song on the way home... It's been in my player all along but I never quite got to hear it till this afternoon... quite a fun and unbeat and kiddy but not-so-kiddy song... as in, kiddy words but huge in meaning. :) Shall end with it:

BIG HOUSE
by Audio Adrenaline

I don't know where you lay your head
or where you call your home
I don't know where you eat your meals
or where you talk on the phone
I don't know if you got a cook
a butler or a maid
I don't know if you got a year
with a hammock in the shade

I don't know if you got some shelter
say a place to hide
I don't know if you live with friends
in whom you can confide
I don't know if you got a family
say a mom or dad
I don't know if you feel love at all
but I bet you wish you had

Come and go with me
to my Fathers house
Come and go with me
to my Fathers house

It's a big big house
with lots and lots a room
A big big table
with lots and lots of food
A big big yard
where we can play football
A big big house
Its my Fathers house

Ibidibidee bop bop bow whew! yeah!

All I know is a big ole house
with rooms for everyone
All I know is lots a land
where we can play and run
All I know is you need love
and I've got a family
All I know is your all alone
so why not come with me?

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As always.

And there are days when I really hope that days will just be nicely spent doing the things you like to do... spending a quiet day at west coast for a retreat... chillin out with people... without the thought of work hangin over the shoulders.

I so look forward to the days when I can finally stop all the design work and focus on the studying and project coordination... and have more time for my family... and Char.

Find rest my soul... in Christ alone.

Chongwe has a point there on the tagboard regarding the number of teams wanting my coaching... but I think I will enjoy coaching the teams far better than what's needed to be done now.

And I have to constantly remember that that in itself is a blessing.

Konk out time.

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Those who have read the news will know of a secondary 4 boy from St Hilda's who passed on due to dengue haemorrhagic fever.

Going by the news... and some things that his friends wrote in their sites, it does shed some light as to why He has to let it happen this way.

One of his friends summed it up pretty well.

What kind of legacy are you going to leave behind when that day comes for you...? He's only 16... but look at his legacy.

And more importantly... do you really know where you're going after that?

I don't know him personally now... but one thing I do know... is that I'll like to meet up with him again one day... and my grandma... and Blenheim... who passed on early last year.

To Samuel's friend if you ever chance upon this: let his legacy live on in you... and in all those whose lives he's touched throughout the 16 years of his life. The way you all responded to everything... it encourages the entire body. Take care and be strong, brother. :)

Its too sudden Lord. Why did you take him away?

He promised you to serve in the boy's brigade. But he couldnt. Now i think i am more than determined to do so...

right now...

i know you are in control... yeslord you are.... always......

I rejoice in Lord for he has been called home to you... May God Bless him and all of us in this difficult time....

Samuel, you will be greatly missed. Your legacy will continue in all of us who knew you so well and shared joy and bitterness together...

Sorry we couldnt establish the tabernacle together...

GOD I FEEL TERRIBLE NOW!!!!!

it feel so damn weird typing this out.... My mind is ina mix now...

i need time.

On the 14th of September 2006 at approximately 7.30pm, our dear friend Samuel Tan was called home to be with the Lord . It was a devastating day for most of us who knew him. i am saddened of not being able to see him and talk to him again. Little did i know that my conversation with him 2 days ago on the phone would be my last.

But then again, i am reassured that i will one day speak to him again, not on this earth, but in a place much better than this planet, with no limits and no governence by time nor any other authority than God who loves us so much. Brothers and Sisters, we should be happy for him. For he is in a better place now, and he doesnt need to suffer the trials of this world. But of course, we will all miss him.

A little of samuel's life and personality.
I looked upon him many times as an outstanding role model of integrity and perseverance. He had all the qualities of a leader and was a leader in the making. At times he would reach out to those who struggled and he was a terribly polite person. we will miss him
When tasked with projects, he will never fail to press on and overcome all possible obstacles so long as there is a single breath in him. Working with him in the boy's brigade was indeed an honour and a priviledge. we will miss him
There are only a few individuals in this world who are worth our respect and friendship, and leadership. Samuel Tan was one of these gifted children of God. There will never be another like him in his special way. we will miss him

Reality sets in, and we must all accept the reality that Sam is no longer walking in this world with us, but he is dwelling in a realm that far outshines this earth. Just as Mr Ong our principal shared, let us all learn to turn this series of events into strength. Let us all reflect on how we should spend the remaining days of our lives, glorifying God and serving him faithfully. Let us cherish this breath of life that our Lord gave us for the sole purporse of fulfilling his work until he returns and we be reunited with him.

Praise God.

The Lord is my Shepherd, and i shall not be in want.
He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters,
he restores my soul.
He guides me in the path of righteousness for his name's sake.
Even though i walk through the valley of the shadow of death,
i will fear no evil,
for you are with me,
your rod and your staff they comfort me.
You prepare a table for me in the presence of my enemies
you annoint my head with oil, my cup overflows.
Surely goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life,
and i will dwell in the house of the LORD
forever.
-Psalm 23.

i believe i know why Samuel had to go. It was God's way and purpose for each and every one of us. Personally, i knew the message. I have to change myself, my personality, my character.

I feel so ashamed really, and im determined to change completely.

Tryin my very best to throw away my old self.

ITs been a numb weekend for me. A part of me still resists against reality of the fact that sam's gone. Still, i am slowly accepting this. No doubt its gonna affect my in my prelims, but hey thats another thing.

The only thing in my mind now is to execute a smooth crematory service for him in about a few hours time.

Thanks my friends for the support and encouragement.

Please pray for us, the 8 ofus who will be the coffin bearers. Pray that we will be strong and will be able to withstand the weight of the coffin.

i thank God for giving us such a understanding principal. We had our prelims postponed two days later. Mr ong is an amazing person.. i really respect him.

Even so, to some, if not most of us, two days isnt enough for myself to recuperate. Everyday i would always think of him, and i would never fail to weep, and break down. its tough. even though i mention that the weeping had to stop, its hard.

Its so hard for me to comprehend the reason why this is happening. i know the reason, but perhaps there could be another possible way of bringing us back to the Boy's Brigade. But then again, God knows us so well. He loves us.

I still mourn, and grieve for a fellow friend, who was a boy, but a man at heart. One of the best of friends i could ever have in my life. I so , very much, regret not talking to him more often, catching up with him.

we all loved him. the pain, of this departure is so seemingly unbearable. Its a weight i have to withstand. my heart still aches, but my hopes still remain. This is true mourning. you lose a loved one, and knowing that you will meet again, u still breakdown, and weep over the separation. but its only physical, not spiritual.
i Pray that God will always stand by me, and lift me up. i so very much need God right now..

i feel so lost, so undefined.. yet hopeful at times...

its a rollercoaster. is this the process of mourning?

God, please, help all of us...

Its time to move on...

Ive already begun resuming my studies...

im recovering... Praise the Lord

"I have fought the good fight, i have finished the race, i have kept the faith. Now there is in store for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will award to me on that day- and not only to me, but also to all who have longed for his appearing."- 2 Timothy 4: 7-8

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I used to shun away from books written by Philip Yancey.... I can still remember the very first time I read the first few pages of one of his books years ago and not understanding more than half of what was written. Haha... so certain things do come with time - time spent growing in our relationship with God. Especially the Bible itself - certain passages that meant nothing much in the past now meant so much.

There are many parts I wished to quote from his book, "What's So Amazing About Grace?"... and actually if it's ever possible I'll really like to quote everything - every chapter's filled with words that speak... words that should mean something both to the believer and the non believing.

So... without further ado.

Irregardless of what you believe in, if you really want to know what Christianity is really meant to be and you don't mind a reading challenge, pick up this book and read it for yourself.

It should be available at all major Christian bookstores out there (Life bookshop at Jurong point, Junction 8, Funan the IT mall, just to name a few, ACTS Lifestyle bookstore at Raffles City, Chinasquare Central, etc) or book warehouses like SKS (Tan Boon Liat building level 9 and 10), Campus Crusade and Navigators warehouses.

Come to think of it... perhaps I should have a section to provide information on Christian resources in Singapore yes? Why didn't I think of that earlier... Hmmm. Anyone wants to help?

I sense in Jesus' approach a fulfillment, not an abolition, of the Old Testament laws. God had "hallowed" creation by separating the sacred from the profane, the clean from the unclean. Jesus did not cancel out the hallowing principle, rather he changed its source. We ourselves can be agents of God's holiness, for God now dwells within us. In the midst of an unclean world we can stride, as Jesus did, seeking ways to be a source of holiness. The sick and the maimed are for us not hot spots of contamination but potential reservoirs of God's mercy. We are called upon to extend that mercy, to be conveyers of grace, not avoiders of contagion. Like Jesus, we can help make the "unclean" clean.

It took the church some time to adjust to this dramatic change - otherwise Peter would not have needed the rooftop vision. Similarly, the church needed a supernatural prod before carrying the gospel to Gentiles. The Holy Spirit was happy to oblige, sending Philip first to Samaria and then directing him to a desert road where he met a foreigner, a black man, and one judged unclean under Old Testament rules. A short time later, Philip baptised the first missionary to Africa.

The aposle Paul - initially one of the most resistant to change, a "Pharisee of the Pharisees" who had daily thanked God he was not a Gentile, salve, or women - ended up writing these revolutionary words: "There is neither Jew nor Greek, slave nor free, male nor female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus." Jesus' death, he said, broke down the temple barriers, dismantling the dividing walls of hostility that had separated categories of people. Grace found a way.

In the same church service in which Bill Leslie divided our sanctuary into the approximate proportions of the Jewish temple, members of the congregation acted out a skit, Several petitioners approached the platform to deliver a message to the priest - with the women, of course, relying on their male representatives. Some brought sacrifices for the priest to present to God. Others made specific requests: "Could you talk to God about my problem?" they asked. Each time the "priest" would mount the platform, go through the prescribed ritual, and submit the request to God inside the Most Holy Place.

Suddenly, in the midst of the ceremony, a young woman came running down the aisle, disregarding the boundary set for her gender, with a Bible open to the book of Hebrews. "Hey, any of us can talk to God directly!" she proclaimed. "Listen to this."

[ Therefore, since we have a great high priest who was gone through the heavens, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold firmly to the faith we profess... Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence. ]

"And here it is again,"

[ ... since we have confidence to enter the Most Holy Place by the blood of Jesus, by a new and living way opened for us through the curtain, that is, his body, and since we have a great priest over the house of God, let us draw near to God... ]

"Any of us can enter the Most Holy Place!" she said before running offstage. "Any of us can come to God directly!"

In his sermon, the pastor spoke of th remarkable change of "God drawing near." You need only read the book of Leviticus and then turn to Acts to sense the seismic change. Whereas Old Testament worshippers purified themselves before entering the temple and presented their offerings to God through a priest, in Acts God's followers (good Jews, most of them) were meeting in private homes and addressing God with the informal Abba. It was a familiar terms of family affection, like "Daddy,' and before Jesus no one would have thought of applying such a word to Yahweh, the Sovereign Lord of the Universe. After him, it became the standard word used by early Christians to address God in prayer.

Earlier, I drew a parallel of a visitor in the White House. No such visitor, I said, could expect to barge into the Oval Office to see the President without an appointment. There are exceptions. During John F. Kennedy's administration, photographers sometimes captured a winsome scene. Seated around the President's desk in grey suits, cabinet members are debating matters of the world consequence, such as the Cuban missle crisis. Meanwhile, a toddler, the two-year-old John-John, crawls atop the huge Presidential desk, oblivious to White House protocol and the weighty matters of state. John-John was simply visiting his daddy, and sometimes to his father's delight he would wander into the Oval Office with nary a knock.

That is the kind of shocking accessibility conveyed in Jesus' word Abba. God may be the Sovereign Lord of the Universe, but through his Son, God has made himself as approachable as any doting human father. In Romans 8, Paul brings the image of intimacy even closer. God's Spirit lives inside us, he says, and when we do not know what we ought to pray "the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express."

We need not approach God by a ladder of hierarchy, anxious about cleanliness issues. If God's kingdom had a "No Oddballs Allowed" sign posted, none of us could get in. Jesus came to demonstrate that a perfect and holy God welcomes pleas for help from a widow with two mites and from a Roman centurion and a miserable publican and a thief on a cross. We need only call out "Abba" or, failing that, simply groan. God has come that close.

A prostitute, a wealthy exploiter, a demon-possessed woman, a Roman soldier, a Samaritan with running sores and another Samaritan with serial husbands - I marvel that Jesus gained the reputation as being a "friend of sinners" like these. As Helmut Thielicke wrote:

[ Jesus gained the power to love harlots, bullies, and ruffians... he was able to do this only because he saw through the filth and crust of degeneration, because his eye caught the divine original which is hidden in every way - in every man!... First and foremost he gives us new eyes...

When Jesus loved a guild-laden person and helped him, he saw in him an erring child of God. He saw in him a human being whom his Father loved and grieved over because he was going wrong. He saw him as God originally designed and meant him to be, and therefore he saw through the surface later of grime and dirt to th real man underneath. Jesus did not identify the person with his sin, but rather saw in this sin something alien, something that really did not belong to him, something that merely chained and mastered him and from which he would free him and bring him back to his real self. Jesus was able to love men because he loved them right through the layer of mud. ]

We may be abominations, but we are still God's pride and joy. All of us in the church need "grace-healed eyes" to see the potential in others for the same grace that God has so lavishly bestowed on us. "To love a person", said Dostoevsky, "means to see him as God intended him to be."

Ah. Fingers tired. Hahaha...

I walked along the pathway this morning as the bright morning sun shone its crimson orange against the white concrete structures flanking my right... and He said ever so softly...

This is My job... this is My work... not yours. I just want you to be a part of it... and rejoice when all things come to pass.

Am I to believe...?

Then I rememebered...

"For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways," declares the LORD.

"As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts. - Isaiah 55:8-9

Do you not know? Have you not heard? The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom.

He gives strength to the weary
and increases the power of the weak.

Even youths grow tired and weary,
and young men stumble and fall;
but those who hope in the LORD
will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
they will run and not grow weary,
they will walk and not be faint.

- Isaiah 40:28-31

And I pray that God will open your eyes to understand.

Come, all you who are thirsty, come to the waters; and you who have no money, come, buy and eat!

Come, buy wine and milk without money and without cost.

Why spend money on what is not bread, and your labor on what does not satisfy?

Listen, listen to me, and eat what is good, and your soul will delight in the richest of fare.

- Isaiah 55:1-2

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Okay... this is one of the days I have to give in to my body system.

Anyways.

Before I go.

:)

0

Pedagogy - teaching children.

Andragogy - teaching adults.

In pedagogy, maintaining class discipline is the main concern. In andragogy, it's the issue of not being resourceful enough to answer the questions given by students.

That explains why lecture systems aren't implemented till students enter junior colleges or polytechnics... and why they're implemented on much larger scales in universities.

My cough's worsened after two classes. Had an uncontrollable coughing fit for the past few minutes in the staff room... :|

Anyways. Introduced the classes to the competition that I will be coordinating in school... It's a competition that I'd taken part in many times in the past. Looking at the photos sure brings back memories... Haha.

ThinkQuest was one of the highlights of my secondary school and junior college days... but I can never imagine that I'll actually be back in school to coordinate the competition and to coach teams. It's quite unimaginable... these open doors... really very hard to attribute it to chance.

Looking forward towards seeing teams work together... and dreams fulfilled.

Travelling overseas would have only been a dream... :)

(temptations)

I remember many years back I coined something like this in relation to temptation... that "every temptation is an opportunity to come obey".

I think today's devotional explains it very well.

Is There Good in Temptation?
from Oswald Chambers' "My Utmost for His Highest"

"No temptation has overtaken you except such as is common to man..." - 1 Corinthians 10:13

The word temptation has come to mean something bad to us today, but we tend to use the word in the wrong way. Temptation itself is not sin; it is something we are bound to face simply by virtue of being human. Not to be tempted would mean that we were already so shameful that we would be beneath contempt. Yet many of us suffer from temptations we should never have to suffer, simply because we have refused to allow God to lift us to a higher level where we would face temptations of another kind.

A person's inner nature, what he possesses in the inner, spiritual part of his being, determines what he is tempted by on the outside. The temptation fits the true nature of the person being tempted and reveals the possibilities of his nature. Every person actually determines or sets the level of his own temptation, because temptation will come to him in accordance with the level of his controlling, inner nature.

Temptation comes to me, suggesting a possible shortcut to the realization of my highest goal - it does not direct me toward what I understand to be evil, but toward what I understand to be good. Temptation is something that confuses me for a while, and I don't know whether something is right or wrong. When I yield to it, I have made lust a god, and the temptation itself becomes the proof that it was only my own fear that prevented me from falling into the sin earlier.

Temptation is not something we can escape; in fact, it is essential to the well-rounded life of a person. Beware of thinking that you are tempted as no one else - what you go through is the common inheritance of the human race, not something that no one has ever before endured. God does not save us from temptations -He sustains us in the midst of them.

"Because he himself suffered when he was tempted, he is able to help those who are being tempted." - Hebrews 2:18

"For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are - yet was without sin. Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need." - Hebrews 4:15-16

(well)

I almost missed one of the classes' lessons again. Last time round it was due to a change of schedule... and I wasn't informed of it. It happened again today. If the other consortium's able to inform me of their shuffles I don't see why this has to happen again. Oh wells.

But thankfully I was able to make it down in time still to talk about the competition and to pass the guys the class photos.

But I really didn't expect that there would be students who'd assume that I'd conveniently forgotten about their lesson again... and not take the initiative to contact me.

So that's the impression I've left.

Then I've really got nothing to say.

Still it doesn't discount the fact that that's one of the more enjoyable classes I'll like to teach.

If only youths are able to take a step back and look at others before looking at themselves.

Then again. I was once like that. Haha...

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我生病了。

Hur hur. First it was a little throat discomfort... it developed into a sore throat overnight... next came the runny nose that really ran non stop... and then the cough came.

Logically speaking, I'll be down with a fever by tomorrow.

Let's see how.

Haha...

You know what.

It's both exciting and scary at the same time to just let God do what He wants one step at a time. Because for one, it may appear to others that I'm generally planless and clueless.

Well.

That's why I hold on so much to vindication.

Are you someone who'll keep the best parts of a meal to the last and then eat them? Or do you attack the choiciest parts immediately once the plate's placed in front of you?

Delayed gratification.

:)

Ah. I realised that this discourse is really a discourse.

Haha. Time for bed!

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It's finally here... after three years. To the tune of... guess? Haha... :)

在成长的岁月里
你默默留下了踪影
虽然那时还懵懂
还依然看不清
你依旧看顾我
用岁月慢慢来诉说
生命活来之意义
全都在你那儿里

自从认识你至今看得清晰
是你恩典给我力量活下去

感谢你上帝
你所赐的爱无人相比
十架上宝血为我淋
洗净我罪给予我命
感谢你上帝
在黑暗中发光让我行
时时刻刻点燃我心灵
引导着我让我的生命有意义

生命里所有东西
总有一天会说分离
是你让我不惧怕
有勇气去靠近
亲信在你国度里
是我们永恒居所地
无愁无泪无结局
充满欢乐气息

自从认识你至今看得清晰
是你恩典给我力量活下去

感谢你上帝
你所赐的爱无人相比
十架上宝血为我淋
洗净我罪给予我命
感谢你上帝
在黑暗中发光让我行
时时刻刻点燃我心灵
引导着我让我的生命有意义
耶稣，你所赐的爱无人相比
耶稣，我要一生一世跟随你

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Credo in Deum Patrem omnipotentem,
I believe in God the Father Almighty,

Creatorem caeli et terrae.
Maker of heaven and earth.

Et in Iesum Christum, Filium Eius unicum, Dominum nostrum,
And in Jesus Christ his only Son our Lord;

qui conceptus est de Spiritu Sancto,
who was conceived by the Holy Ghost,

natus ex Maria Virgine,
born of the Virgin Mary,

passus sub Pontio Pilato,
suffered under Pontius Pilate,

crucifixus, mortuus, et sepultus,
dead, and buried;

descendit ad ínferos,
he descended into hell;

tertia die resurrexit a mortuis,
the third day he rose again from the dead;

ascendit ad caelos,
he ascended into heaven,

sedet ad dexteram Dei Patris omnipotentis,
and sitteth on the right hand of God the Father Almighty;

inde venturus est iudicare vivos et mortuos.
from thence he shall come to judge the quick and the dead.

Credo in Spiritum Sanctum,
I believe in the Holy Ghost;

sanctam Ecclesiam catholicam,
the holy catholic Church;

sanctorum communionem,
the communion of saints;

remissionem peccatorum,
the forgiveness of sins;

carnis resurrectionem,
the resurrection of the body;

vitam aeternam. Amen.
and the life everlasting. AMEN.

(passing thought)

A person can be a Methodist but not a Christian... a Baptist, a Presbyterian, an Anglican... or someone from any other denomination... a Roman Catholic... but not a Christian.

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It was an ordinary day... classes went on as usual... there in a class, a teacher went through the things needed for the coming exams.

A student asked for permission to go to the toilet... and never returned.

It was later found out that it wasn't the toilet he went to.

With everything left behind and most probably with just his wallet with him, he took transport to another area... went to some high rise place... and jumped.

I never imagined that my heart could sink so low for someone whom I don't even know.

But it did.

Am praying... for his family, his friends, the people around him... the school concerned... which has always been on my heart.

A promising young lad... no one really knows what drove him to that.

If anything, this generation needs to be conditioned to respond in times of failure... of any form.

Grades aren't everything... relationships aren't everything... find someone to talk to when things are perceived as not going well. Just don't bottle them up... seek counsel.

Praying.

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The Human Being

The human being is a tri-part being consisting of the body (soma), the soul (psyche) and the spirit (pneuma) - be him religious or not.

The body (soma) is the tangible part of a human being which gives the person his physical presence. This is the part we all can see. If we say that a person is here but the soma is nowhere in sight, then something must be terribly wrong. Our tangible senses come from the soma.

The Emotional Being
(EQ - emotional quotience)

The soul (psyche) is the intangible part of a human being which gives the person his emotional presence. If this area gets disturbed constantly (ie stress), it will affect the soma and together they form the emotional being.

The Holistic Being
(AQ - adversity quotience)

The spirit (pneuma) is at the top of the triangle of the tri-part being. It is the unseen force that holds the being together to form the holistic person... and often translated as faith, which brings the person through especially in times of immense change, loss or difficulty.

For most people, even religious people unbeknownst to themselves, their spirit tend to be tagged to finite and fallible objects - self, parents, the significant other, money, the things money can buy, personal achievements, personal possessions, comfort and shelter, etc.

People who plunge into depression are often those who've gotten their spirit taken away; the holistic being basically crumbles.

What is your spirit... who is your spirit?

The Fruitcake

What holds the fruitcake together - the fruit or the flour?

Take out all the little fruit bits - does the cake still stand?

We are all born naked, without the clothing and watches we're wearing, without the phones we're carrying, without the possessions we currently own without the relationships we've made along the way...

When they're taken out of our lives, they leave a dent, a space that often than not cannot be replaced.

A family gets hit with a financial crisis - they cannot live in the condomimium which they've always been living in anymore but have to downsize to a much smaller flat.

Often than not, the persons involved downsize themselves as well. In an attempt to erase the space from the cake, the cake is sqeezed... the bigger the space, the more it's being sqeezed... the more spaces there are, the more it's being squeezed... and that is how people end up in the crushed state.

The loss of property, the loss of loved ones, the loss of job, the lost of authority for some...

The spaces in fact do not need to be filled up again or hidden away. The cake is still there. Standing.

But what if the fruitcake is primarily 99% filled with huge chucks of fruits instead... a "cakefruit"?

We have been asked in class yesterday what will happen if a loved one is taken away from us this very moment.

Death seems to be a taboo word in our society today... and especially amongst the Chinese. But it is a fact that all of us die one day... we all will leave this world one day.

And as a counsellor (secular or not) in training, one of the things we must learn... is to learn to say goodbye.

The question is one that's always been on my mind... and coming from a family with many close calls with the word, I wouldn't say that I've grown numb. I'm sure the grief period will come... but eventually I will also know that this is just a temporary separation from the eternity that we have with our Maker, an eternity with everlasting peace and joy, without tears, all promised in His Word.

The deeper the relationship one has with Him, the easier it really is for one to handle losses.

I've learnt what it meant to be contented... I'm at a stage where I think I have a better understanding of what Paul wrote about in his final epistolic letter to the Philippians.

And I find most of my worries borne out of knowing that there're many more friends out there who have yet to believe.

And this is totally my opinion... that for those who've never seriously considered about all these... they're those who've never really suffered losses in their lives to date... or rather, huge losses. But then again, it doesn't require for that to happen before people start to think.

Then again. We're given the freedom to choose.

What is your spirit... who is your spirit?

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Three more days to our fifth month together.

Not patronising her because she is my girlfriend... but I think it's really hard to find someone like her ever again.

I was looking through my video archives some days back... and came across the varsity fellowship orientation camp video taken back in 2003. We were in the same group then... and it's just amazing to look at those footages and look at all that's going on now... Loss of words. :)

I took a look at Galations 5:22-23:

"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, temperance: against such there is no law."

And found the Holy Spirit ever working in her.

And the unexplainable gush of emotions as I read her latest entry... that maturity... that faith... that love.

Reproduced here with her permission.

Thank You... thank you.

ohhh it's the middle of the night and I'm awake. Slowly came awake after a really confusing dream and I kind of got more and more awake as I tried to make sense of it .. until I just decided to wake up go pee and conveniently forget about it. But now I'm so awake and I think the occasion merits some blogging, cos I can't remember the last time I was awake at this hour with this sense of clear-headedness.

Life has been different since the last time I used to blog fairly regularly. Maybe it's because I was afraid of the responses I would get if I truly said what I felt, that people would read and judge the differences in my life, or perhaps just simply judge me. I remember a time I used to say whatever I wanted with abandon because I had such an overwhelming sense that this place was really all about me, whatever I wanted to say and vent .. but then it got to be that venting became something that had a price, that things that I said here would have repercussions in reality. This is one way in which my life has changed actually, it applies to how I'm living the rest of my life as well. Not daring to be as totally candid and transparent as I like because of the fear that people would misunderstand and be hurt or angry or confused and go on to do the things that hurt, angry and confused people do. Or simply that they just wouldn't understand.

Well, I'll just try to describe things as they are now, while I'm still trying to figure everything out.

Been spending quite a lot of time with Galvin's mum lately. And this is something that I really see God's hand in .. how her admission to hospital came just the week after the Sunday afternoon I managed to spend an extended time alone with her for the first time. If not for that Sunday afternoon, I wouldn't have felt comfortable enough to have spent that much time with her in the hospital alone .. to be there for her in that way. So I really thank God for His goodness in opening the doors for my heart's wish to become a reality, especially as this is something I had always kind of wished for ever since Galvin and I got together, but always kindof feared because I was not sure how she felt about me, she and Galvin being so close. The very first time I met her she didn't even look at or smile at me. What a long way God has brought us since then .. and in such a short time too. But this is not a relationship that I begin building up without some anxiety .. some fear that I'm really barging head on into something that will prove too big for me to chew. After all, I am aware that some people might view this as becoming too familiar with Galvin's family too fast .. making myself a part of too many areas of his life all at once, even in his relationship with his mum. Such worries occur to me rather frequently too ... what if things don't work out and I'm just putting myself in a position to do more hurt to him, myself, my family and his family if that turns out to be the case? I can't deny that I'm very aware of the effect that my relationship with his mum has on Galvin himself .. and even the way in which her heart too has opened to me in a way that only God's grace can have made possible. But yet all these developments make me fear and doubt that I do these only to win his favour, all the while knowing that the stakes are too high now for my little-girl games. Even though I've questioned myself over and over in my heart and know as far as I can that each moment I spend with her comes from a genuine desire to do so for her, herself, it just worries me sometimes that deep down in the deceitfulness of the human heart this might not be the case. I try to prove my sincerity to myself by spending time with her even when it means a sacrifice of time and energy for me that might not include the 'reward' of seeing Galvin, in times when he's not able to be around. Always, I have found that that time spent with her is a blessing in itself .. there is a stillness and peacefulness that I find in her company and in the simple joy of playing fingergames and having her laugh or mouth words at me.

So that's how it is at the moment .. the sense that God is doing new things in my life and pouring grace into it most abundantly, but still there is that unavoidable sense of uncertainty that comes with the venturing into unknown territory. As I've mentioned to Galvin more than a few times, I've always had such a sheltered and trouble-free life .. and that thought keeps recurring to me because I'm afraid that when my mettle is tested, I will prove to be too soft and useless in times when I need to be strong. In joking reply he's sometimes said that the one who follows him will have a hard life, cos his life has always been full of trial, or 'ming ku' as he put it .. but there have been times when he said it and I sensed that he was being absolutely serious.

He doesn't often talk to me about the pains and struggles that he must experience in relation to his family's trials. And maybe he is wise in hesitating to share them with me. For who knows how much I can take .. exactly when I will begin to shake my head and back away saying that 'no, this life can't be for me'. I guess only God knows .. and it's Him I'm trusting as I take each step of this journey. That he will give the grace even as he reveals to me and helps me understand fully what it is that is meant by the phrase that 'his burdens will be my burdens' (I meant this phrase to refer only to Galvin but lo and behold the lack of capitalisation gives this another meaning that refers to God's burdens .. and what a wonderful way in which God has put this into perspective for me .. that yes. whatever He has in store for me are really His burdens .. and what a joy it will be when I reach that point when I know that I have exchanged my own puny burdens for His glorious ones).

During those visits at the hospital, there was one particular time when the nurses had to do a procedure to clean up the site of the insertion of the feeding tube in Galvin's mum's tummy, so that it wouldn't get infected. As nobody else was around, Aunty Witwit asked me to stay and listen to the nurse's instructions as he demonstrated how to clean the area, just in case she wasn't able to understand properly. Haha .. I half think she did this on purpose, to show me what exactly it is I might have to handle, especially as she had just told me earlier how I must be prepared to help Galvin take care of his mum next time(Galvin himself has never spoken to me about this, and again I think he is wise .. to wait and let God do what he has to). So I stayed, and held his mum's hand through the procedure. She squeezed it real hard everytime the pain became bad, and for the super squeamish me who usually can't stand the site of blood or anything that looks physically disgusting .. who begins feeling like puking at the thought of wounds or puke or shit or anything like that - well I guess I'm amazed I didn't pass out or puke all over the place. Squeamishness aside, my heart nearly broke at her having to go through that pain and just her having to be in that state .. and I don't know how Galvin has been able to take everything that has happened and continues to do so. Well, I guess humanly speaking he can't .. and it's all by God's grace. But even so, I wonder if I could. On the way back to school after that I had a vision of myself fastforwarded a few years, frustrated and angry at home while having to take care of a wailing baby as well as Galvin's mum while he's away at work. And really, it was so vivid, the thought of how the stresses of life in such a situation would make me really resent Galvin and have us always quarrelling, and me always in tears. The first impulse was to really ask myself, is this the future I want? If all my good grades and success in school and church and in general were really leading up to such a life as this? And then I realised that because of my dear Pa, my loving heavenly Father .. things never have to be perceived that way .. and I forcefully pushed that vision away from my mind.

So step by step .. as my Saviour leads. I'm trusting that as I continue to walk towards all He has for me .. He'll transform me into that person and partner that I need to be. Boy it sure looks like a lot of work but I guess God knows what He's doing! And in that I rest confident :) So well .. super long entry this time. And who knows when I'll blog again? But it's been good .. putting all these thoughts finally down into words. And maybe all my friends out there whom I've been so forever dreamy to these days may catch a glimpse of the stuff that's been occupying my mind and heart. ;p

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It is said that adolescence is a stage where it is a natural tendency for teenagers to test boundaries... and today I've found some past wounds that're starting to see new flesh again... raw flesh.

It gets a wee bit discouraging and your enthusiasm doused out when the lesson you painstakingly took time to prepare gets greeted with disinterest.

Given a chance, I would have done so differently, set boundaries in play and keep firm at them. But it may be a bit too late for this batch I guess. If I'm given the opportunity next year to take another batch, I'll make sure I'll do just that.

We all learn by mistakes... don't we? I just hope that the mistakes we make don't come at the expense of the future of others.

Thanking God for those who really wanted to learn... who paid attention throughout the cacophony. Thank You for those who made an effort to work on the tasks assigned to them instead of doing things they're not supposed to do... thank You too for those who wandered off into their own worlds...

Because all of us are equally undeserving of the kind of grace You give.

Well. There's tomorrow to look forward to when I meet two of the classes I really want to meet again. :)

Yea. Back to school for another week to relief my teacher who's flown for recruitment again.

(thank you last class for wednesday)

For trying despite the difficulties.

For your sustained attention.

For putting gladness in my heart as I said good afternoon and thank you class.

But to the one who tagged me that... Grow up can. Haha...

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Caught this show with Char today... It's funny how Jen guessed that that'll be the show I'll be watching when I bumped into her at the shopping mall... "cause that's very galvin".

Ah.

Haha... but yeah. I guess I got what she meant.

We both thought it's going to be a comedy... well, at least a reflective piece of work with a tinge of humour... how wrong we were.

But it really served as a good wrap-up for the things we've been learning in the youth services for the past few weeks. It's nothing new... but when things are placed in tangible imageries, it gets reinforced... It came pretty strongly especially when the fire burnt up the paper bungalow, the paper car...

Cash, condominum, credit card, car and country club membership...

or Christ?

"Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also." - Matthew 6:19-21

"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?

And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? So do not worry, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." - Matthew 6:25-34

"But godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it. But if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that. People who want to get rich fall into temptation and a trap and into many foolish and harmful desires that plunge men into ruin and destruction. For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs.

But you, man of God, flee from all this, and pursue righteousness, godliness, faith, love, endurance and gentleness. Fight the good fight of the faith... Command those who are rich in this present world not to be arrogant nor to put their hope in wealth, which is so uncertain, but to put their hope in God, who richly provides us with everything for our enjoyment. Command them to do good, to be rich in good deeds, and to be generous and willing to share. In this way they will lay up treasure for themselves as a firm foundation for the coming age, so that they may take hold of the life that is truly life." - 1 Timothy 6:6-12,17-19

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I received this evening this sms from a brother whom I never had:

Bro. You take care, I'm committed to pray for you n family. Pls msg me when you need ok? :) rest well. May His strength n grace be with you daily :)

He's someone who's always been encouraging me in this journey... and I thank God for people like him. :)

This week hasn't been the best of week with the recovering of the drive crashes and mom's hospitalisation... Wouldn't say that they're the cause of whatever gloominess I'd displayed here and there... but yeah. I've got some old issues to settle with Pa... and for all the things that's happened... it just makes me feel that I've once again taken so many things for granted.

Many things... but above all, Him.

And He still keeps on sending encouragements upon encouragements.

The way the guys paced about trying to memorize Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 in the midst of dg this afternoon was amusing... and really encouraging. And the very fact that they remembered all the previous verses we've gone through... I guess they won't know how much they served as an encouragement.

I don't know if I've jumped the gun... but I issued a challenge today to them. Well... see how it goes. :)

I brought home the guitar which I've left in church for the past months... shall spend some time with it later. :)

(an sms conversation)

It's one more hour to your birthday... one thing I know is that regardless of the way you've chosen to go, His love for you has never changed a single bit. And if ever you need an encouragement, remember you have a brother who loves you... and will pray for as long as it takes. Take care and happy birthday my brother. :)

Thx kor Thx... Wil b back when i'm ready...

Even if it means years. Take care.

U too.. Thx..

Ask you.. Is it really cool to be involved in the things you're involved in?

Not reeli...

I can only pray He protects you physically. I want to see you in one piece in the future. :) Shan't waste your smses anymore. Take care of yourself.

And this is what faith is all about. Personally I don't think he'll be back anytime soon... that'll be a miracle in a miracle. Got to trust in His good timing... got to trust in His sovereign will.

If our heavenly Father hasn't given up on anyone of us, I don't see why we should give up on others and say they're hopeless, stupid, fools, idiots, good-for-nothing... for the matter.

And for him to reply... and to call me that still... that's a miracle already... and I shall not take that for granted.

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I went in search for the raw files I used to record "That's Where We'll Go" way back in 2003... remembered I archived my past song projects as well as all other projects. Perhaps I've remembered wrongly that I've burned them in dvds... cause I can't find them. Then I rememebered that I'd kept them in my laptop's removable drive.

Slotted it into the laptop.

The light flashed.

But the laptop refuses to detect the drive.

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Eve jie once wrote in one of her entries this:

The motivation that keeps me going strong in full-time youth ministry is - to see souls saved, life changed for Jesus and I get really excited when I see young people loving the Lord, praising the Lord and living a healthy life for the Lord! So you can imagine that I actually enjoy looking at HG worshipping the Lord when I need encouragement, heheh.

HG's salvation is a miracle. I hope he can share with the rest of us about his testimony (in text) one day.

I know I don't have to ever run away from this... cause even in the midst of dryness, my heart feels a gentle touch and my eyes a little welling up as I read that.

I think of 5's salvation... how He's slowly but surely working in 6's life... how He's changed 3 so much... how He's spurring 7 on...

I think of how Retep's relationship with Him grew... how Heibiboy clinged on to love... how Divad switched to wearing contact lenses... Hahaha. More so his growth... how the seemingly quiet Sirhc doesn't seem seemingly quiet anymore... how Bez's grown so much... how Jj's so faithfully reading and memorizing verses... how Desertorz strives to love Him and know Him more... how the two meis are growing...

And I also think of how two dear brothers decided that faith isn't their cup of tea afterall... and turned to street gangs.

He's used youth ministry to turn my life upside down... inside out.

The photo you see up there... it goes beyond the description the word "precious" gives.

Life on earth is transient... and as I read about the secondary three rafflesian's death the past week, it struck me that it could be anyone of them... or the rest of the people around me... or myself.

If only those who haven't known in their hearts... know that there is Someone out there who loves them so much... so very much... that they're born into the world for a purpose... that their destiny is an eternity of everlasting peace and joy... that there is hope.

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Loving Others: Not a Role, but a Lifestyle
This devotional was written by Jim Liebelt

"A new command I give to you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another." - John 13:34

I recently saw a church advertisement in a newspaper that read something like the following:

First Church "God's Love Offered Here" One Sunday Only, June 12, 2005 Special Musical Guest...

Reading this, I laughed out loud. My mind had put the second and third lines together instead of the first two lines, creating "God's Love Offered Here – One Sunday Only, June 12, 2005." I'm sure the church didn't intend for anyone to walk away with the message that they would only offer God's love on one special Sunday, but that's what I came away with! Still, reflecting further on the ad, it occurred to me that withholding God's love from others is all too common for us, who consider ourselves to be followers of Christ.

If you are at all like me, it seems far too easy to compartmentalize our lives into the different roles we play: employee, student, father, mother, husband, wife, son, daughter, friend, consumer, teammate, neighbor, Christian.

Do any of the following sound familiar?

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思念这未来 无灰或尘埃
伤感之情怀 将会被欢乐取代
现实的空白 必扑满色彩
谈不起悲哀 因为爱早已灌溉

我愿你和我一起思念这份未来
无愁无泪无忧无虑 让我们期待

思念这天的到来
不代表要放弃现在
好好珍惜每一刻其美好的时光
与所有的愉快
这一段漫长旅途
有你做伴是种幸福
接下来的日子里愿我们都能够
一同珍惜这份爱

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The 2003 version's written for the nation with two meanings. The 2006 version's written for the church... with two meanings too. :P

THAT'S WHERE WE'LL GO (2006)

I took a little walk
Down this road we call yesterday
It was a humble start
Walked by faith that You'll pave the way
From a mustard seed into a tree
The Master weaves His tapestry
Oh Sovereign Lord
Your faithfulness' all I see

Through the many years
The many trials, the joys, the tears
We see abounding grace
That we may stand here as one, amazed
You have made us more than conquerors
You make us whole in Your great love
United as one
This is where we will be

No one could ever take away
The things You've done throughout the days
I know I'll never be alone
In this place I call my home
Because I know You're always here
I know You'll always be my Friend
In Your hand we'll run this race
Till we see Your face
That's where we'll go

There is no higher goal
Than to love You and know You more
Lord may You draw us near
Fill us up as we go from here
You desire truth in our inward parts
We pray for broken and contrite hearts
To be set apart
That the nations will see

No one could ever take away
The things You've done throughout the days
I know I'll never be alone
In this place I call my home
Because I know You're always here
I know You'll always be my Friend
In Your hand we'll run this race
Till we see Your face
That's where we'll go

(somehow this touched me)

"And grace is the DNA of healthy families.

Healthy families also understand the destructive power of sin.

Which is why we leave the porch light on so that prodigals can find their way home.

But when prodigals do come home we party like its 1999.

Because deep down we know we are all prodigals. Even the ones who never went away. But the crazy love of God welcomes us with open arms.

When we come home to Him."

- Soo-Inn Tan