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It's been week fully packed with many things... by His grace, I was able to wake up at 5am this morning to make it to the first dawn prayer at 6. Covenant Evangelical Free Church's anchoring this week's 24.365 - the non stop daily prayer chain that goes on for a year with an anchoring church each week praying twenty four hours non stop for a week.

And for all that has happened recently... I am thankful that He's given me that desire once again... just in time. Certain things were transacted dearly over the weekend in the midst of youth service on saturday - for one, it was the first in a long time that I've heard so clearly... that I've forgotten that He's given me an open channel to commune with Him. By I don't mean just prayer alone... it's something that He's given me for me to first and foremost build up my relationship with Him... and yet I had it buried somehow for quite some time.

And now that it's unearthed again... mmm. Liberating. :)

Project FriendMarked has been given some press time both in Friday Weekly and The Sunday Times over the past week - really thankful for the coverage. The Friday Weekly report gave a very human touch to the reasons behind the project - I must say that I really enjoyed the interview with Sujun. :) The Sunday Times one is pretty much a straightforward article that tells others what the project is about. As long as people get to know about it. ;) The only "error" perhaps, is that it should not have been coined a business since I don't profit financially out of it... well. Trusting Him to provide enough to keep the website running each year. :)

Just finished marking the last class of test papers not long ago... four more days and it's adios to this batch of students. Took class photos eventually... shall upload all of them when I'm done with the last class.

One day I'll get to teach from start to finish... I hope that's a desire not of myself, but that which is given to me. Hur hur...

Caught "Love Above All", the musical by Mt Carmel Bible Presbyterian Church above the story of Jim Elliot and his four other friends, all who fell victims to the auca indians as they were trying to make contact with them to bring them the good news of Jesus Christ - a tribe entirely cut off from civilisation. Now the entire tribe's saved... stemming from their actions and subsequent ploughing by Jim's wife Elizabeth, who went to live with them despite the fact that her husband's murdered by them.

Such grace... such love.

When others rode on their paper chase and chose wonderful professions upon their graduation, Jim and the few of his friends decided to enter fulltime into missionary work, plunging themselves into the great unknown, and yet trusting that all is well in His hands.

Is it worth it?

I believe that Jim was just heading God's call... and if God would have called him to be the best doctor or lawyer he can be for Him, I'm sure that he would have gladly obeyed. Cause ultimately... when one desires to have his or her will to be aligned to God's, he or she will have to be prepared to obey, regardless if it seems good or bad in man's eyes... no?

Jim wrote this famous quote in his journal... which I have it here upon the header of this website for the past few years:

"He is no fool who gives up what he cannot keep to gain what he cannot lose"

Riches, earthly glory and achivements we cannot keep... an eternal and satisfying relationship with God, treasures stockpiled in heaven... we cannot lose.

What a fool is the man who gains the whole world... yet forfeits his soul.

Teaching / Counselling was an over-my-dead-body option for a full time career.

Now I can't imagine the kind of passion that He's brewing inside of me.

... and that's God. :)

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My room's more or less packed... hopefully it'll remain as such for a pretty long period. Hur hur... Char has opted to cook chicken curry and roti jalal (I still have no idea how it looks like...) for those coming my place later in the evening; she whipped up a healthy version of lasagna and apple crumble for our time together yesterday evening at hers. *smiles*

Just thought I'll jot down a lingering thought... I realised that no matter how much I've improved in my extroversion, I'm still very much an introvert at heart, and definitely a tough block of ice to break. Hmmm... actually more like coconut - hard shell but watery and nice to eat on the inside. Hahahaha... jokes aside, it's pretty much true - it takes me a super long time to warm up to people... and that basically means that I'll never get to really know those whom I correspond with on a touch-and-go basis.

I do wonder how it'll be like if I am to be taking the classes which I took the last time round still - it's nice bumping into some of them in school where we'll smile at one another and exchange acknowledgments... and yet on the other hand, there's this sense of loss of opportunity to get to know any of them better.

Haha... and I guess history's going to repeat itself again soon. Two more weeks with this batch of classes... Gonna bring my camera down this week to take some shots with them.

I have this ding dong desire to have a form class... Haha. As He leads ba.

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Was contacted by a journalist from the Sunday Times who'll like to feature Project FriendMarked in the Click section this weekend. Told her about the wall in my room plastered with the FriendMarks... then she suggested sending the photographer to my place for a photoshoot instead with some of those who've gotten a FriendMark before.

So I'll have quite a number of guests tomorrow evening... Dori suggested that I cook dinner for them since they're doing a favour. I think I'll consult Char on what to cook... Haha.

But that also means that I'll have to launch project clean-your-room tonight and tomorrow after I'm back from work. :| Yes. Messy room. Argh. Hahahaha...

Check out this Sunday's Sunday Times yeah? I guess it should be there... :P

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One of those moments when you're really proud of your alma mater... Hahaha. I guess for the students, most of them only had the thought of going home earlier in mind. ;)

There was a year, ten over years ago, when the same thing happened - it rained in the morning and so there was no opportunity to speak of the wonderful results our ahteletes had handed in. We were asked to assemble at the hall halfway through the day... where our principal would make the announcements and then give us the rest of the day off.

The difference today is that I'm one of those asking students to assemble at the hall halfway through the day. Haha...

Track and Field A, B, C boys champions, A girls 1st runner up, Gymastics A, B, C boys champions, A girls trampoline champions, Judo A, C boys champions, A girls and B boys 1st runner ups, not forgetting the many more championship titles from the other sports, and the many golds and gold with honors from the performing groups, and a clean sweep of gold by the uniformed groups... I guess it was different then viewing all these results from the eyes of a student; now I see a hallmark of excellence.

But then the difference this time round too is that I still have work to do... so I still have to stay still pretty late. :| Hahaha.

I'm happy to be working here... really. There're many things that can be taken for granted - even the students. I might have felt discouraged here and there... but taking a step back, most of them do possess a level of maturity that goes way beyond most of their peers - not just in terms of the academics, but in terms of respect, behaviour - something very evident through daily interactions with them.

After doing one year of relief teaching and contract work... I am really looking forward to the day when I can say for sure... that I am back.

:)

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My stomach's so bloated I wonder how I can get to sleep. :| Haha... Char treated her family together with her grandma and gou gou (aunt) and her bestie Eunice and me to No Signboard Seafood @ Vivocity upon her first paycheck as a trainee teacher. And it was good. Very good. Hahaha...

Char and I went to Vivocity a bit earlier to shop for some candies for her students at Candy Empire - tomorrow's her last day for her month-long school exposure experience before she returns to NIE. Appreciated the time on the bus just talking about the stuff that went through my mind this morning... and yeah, a new perspective came forth in the midst of the conversation... for those who really want to learn and are trying their best to do so and to listen during class, even if there's only one in the class, I think it's worth the preparation work though I'm not required to do so in my capacity in a relief position. And that's really liberating. Not to mention, that all is done unto His glory.

:)

Three classes tomorrow. He'll make me ready. :)

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I just came back from my first class of the day... next one's at twelve noon. This is the first time that I actually felt so discouraged after any class... yeah, it's the "sports" class. But somehow I just can't see how that should distinguish them to be apathetic about their work on the whole. Well... they did not even bother to say thank you and goodbye when the lesson ended - I was at a student's terminal helping him out with his code when the lesson ended, and they simply went off without acknowledging my presence. Not to mention the way they're treating their assignments... well.

I'm not looking at myself. I'm just wondering how to help this class... currently apathetic, unconcerned if they're getting zeros for the assignments they are not handing up. How? I also don't know... I'm doing my best to explain to those who would listen and learn... and as for those who wouldn't, I really don't think I have the resources and time frame to know them enough to speak to them. Talk about the bane of being a relief teacher yeah. Haha...

I find myself not having that kind of energy like last year... where I would try my best to remember names and their faces even though I was only teaching them for about one to two months and meeting them only once a week. Well... feeling great inertia to take photos with the classes this year... should I? Oh wells.

There were many hiccups in signing up for my vocal course at Lee Wei Song School of Music... till now, the cheque sent from the States can't be processed because of the wrong company name written on the cheque. The consolation is that this time round the school had admitted that the error's on their side and they're allowing me to proceed with starting the course first while waiting for the correct cheque to arrive... so, yeah. Should be starting in time to come, an hour a week for a year. My aim? I just want to use this opportunity to be properly trained in my vocals... and hopefully improve my range. As to what this will all lead to in the future... I must say, I'm just committing all these to Him without knowing what will come out of it. And I'm really thankful for how He's provided for my studies even when I was yet a Christian back then... it's something that I'm prone to take for granted especially when I haven't got the need to pay for my tertiary courses for the past years.

Dori (my younger sister) went for her checkup on tuesday... her results showed an inflammed liver again. Her doctor said that she'll have to go for a proper scan to check exactly what's wrong with the liver. The serious implication is that she may not be able to continue with her medications anymore, which she has already stopped taking for the past month or so. This basically means that should the white blood cells shoot right back up again, she would not be able to use her current medication to bring it down anymore, less something happens to her liver.

I... don't know how to type on.

I haven't posted prayer requests for myself and my family here in a long time... sure do hope there are prayer warriors out there who will continue to keep us in prayer:

1. For Dori, that she'll be strong especially through this period of time when she'll no doubt have doubts, questions... for His strength to be upon her, that she'll have the faith to fight on in this journey, to embrace the promises that God has laid down for her, that she'll be able to go about everything with the peace that surpasses all understanding that is in Christ Jesus.
2. For His extra portion of grace to be upon me as I face the many students in school, that He'll lay upon me the compassion to see each one of them as unique individuals, dearly loved, especially when I meet apathetic ones who don't care who you are and what you teach... that He'll empower me to be a testimony.
3. Also that He'll grant me the discipline to spend time with Him in His Word... and to space out my schedules properly so that I'll be able to finish my work on time, especially my design jobs.

When the oceans rise and thunders roar...
I will soar with You above the storms...
Father You are King over the flood...
I will be still and know You are God...

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Haha... it's been some time. *clears cobwebs* Time has been very meaningfully occupied these days... Many things to write and update, but for now I'll leave with a pictorial representation of the days just passed. Got to sleep so I'll wake on time for work.

This hasn't been the best of seasons... but somehow, there're always things, people to give thanks for. :)

Oh yeah. If you'll like to read more about Project FriendMarked and the interview the journalist did with me, do grab a copy of this week's Friday Weekly coming out this Friday. It's a mandarin paper for students aged 12-19... But I guess you can still get it if you don't fall into that age group anymore yeah. Hur hur hur.

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Alright... finally having a slice of kit kat before my counselling practical exam happening in exactly two hours time. The past few days have been amazingly filled to the brim with lessons to prepare, marking to do, thesis to compile and print... Schedules have been so packed I hardly have the appropriate time to exercise anymore. :|

Trying not to imagine how it'll be like next time when I pack a degree and a grad masters course in the evenings whereas I start full time work in the mornings and afternoons. Not mentioning the vocal lessons... :|

But come to think of it, I must never forget the blessing that all these courses are paid for... I can only ask for the strength to last through the days physically and mentally, and the wisdom to aportion time accordingly for the various activities and people in my life, ultimately remembering that I am but a steward of His time and resources.

Met up with a couple of Char's close friends for dinner yesterday evening... We had french food (The French Stall) at little india. Haha... food tasted pretty good. :)

There were three couples there and we took turns to talk about our stories, how we first met and how we got together... I was asked to talk about ours when our turn came.

Hahaha... not all of them are believers as of now, but there wasn't any apprehension as the sharing went on... because we realised that our story would have made no sense at all if we were to leave God out of the picture. It's like, wah... this really wouldn't have been possible if it's not for Him. And I know this sounds stupid... but I suddenly realise again how small how small I am. :P

Finally met up with no.12 for our first meal together... I actually went there with an agenda to listen and talk... guessed he sensed that. Asked God to lead the time amidst my fears of not knowing what to say... and thankfully it went quite well. :) Managed to know this brother a bit more - he's always been quite reticent (not so in the near future... I hope! ;) ). What's more important was some misconceptions (or rather, the lack of information) were corrected - perspectives, beliefs.

Hoping to see him around more often again from now on. :)

Alright... time to prepare for the final onslaught for now. Practical exam... here I come! God help me!!!

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This song was played as background music in the midst of Kiat and Mich's wedding today... and it tied in well with the exhortation given by Pastor Kay Kiong... that one cannot love fully if he or she has not been fully loved.

Those raised up by loving dads and moms will most probably understand better and learn how to love others as they grow up.

As children, we all needed someone there for us to model upon... those who know no love will not understand how to love, that is, the love that is sacrificial, love that asks for nothing in return.

Investing your life in others used to sound right... but now that I understood that the term usually involves a return (especially in finances, when we talk about ROIs, return of investments), I am challenged not to invest my life, but to give it.

To Him first and foremost.

And as I give to others, it will be out of the abundance of the grace, mercy, love, giving that He's given me.

I was deeply moved by that phrase that's in bold above... because I realised that if it's not for the experiences of His love in my life over the past seven years, I really don't think I will ever understand how it is possible to love others (especially as an introvert), even if there is no reciprocation.

No... it's not that I've not experienced love as a child. I don't come from an exactly well to do family but I know my parents did their best to provide in all aspects. But I must say that nothing compares to what I've experienced the past seven years in my personal journey with God.

It's Him who empowers me... not an airy fairy feeling or what, but when you make it personal and know that what Jesus has done on the cross is for you when you absolutely don't deserve it, you'll perhaps catch a glimpse of it. :)

How deep.... how wide... is the Father's love for us.

And I just found my verse for this year. Or rather, these few years... used to have a year verse in the past (1 Thess 5:16-18, Psalm 27:4), but somehow it didn't really continue on. Yay! :)

"I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge - that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God." - Ephesians 3:16-19

NO GREATER LOVE
By Rachael Lampa

Before I knew Your Name,
You knew my ev’ry breath.
Before I found my way,
You knew my ev’ry step.
Before I knew everything that I need,
You gave it all to me.

No greater love than this…
That You should lay down Your life
For someone such as me;
I’d spend a lifetime wondering why.
The Beauty of Heaven
Is here in my heart
And I know there can be
No greater love than this.

I never understood
How merciful Love could be,
Until I felt His Flame
Light every part of me
And I would give everything that I am
’ Cause I have been saved;
Yes, I have been saved!

No greater love than this…
That You should lay down Your life
For someone such as me;
I’d spend a lifetime wondering why.
The Beauty of Heaven
Is here in my heart
And I know there can be
No greater love.

Oh, oh oh, oh oh, woah...

The Beauty of Heaven
Is here in my heart
And I know there can be
No greater love...
For someone such as me.
No greater love...than this.

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I was just complaining to Char before IDT (intentional discipleship training) how my going back to teach has turned my schedules upside down - used to have time each day to do some workouts... I didn't get to run even once this week. :(

Ah wells.

Having said that, I am thankful that I'm back to teach. Really. I never really did think that I would actually enjoy teaching (perhaps I've not yet experienced the full load, including all the admin and what nots) but yeah... it has been a little physically draining. I guess it might have just been me... but I feel uncomfortable giving students half-past-six lessons, even if I'm just covering duties. So I would spend hours just preparing the slides and materials for teaching... last year I actually prepared pre-test notes... think I'll do so this time round... and I'll try hard not to think that they'll just take it for granted, which they most probably will. Hahaha...

What I'm enjoying most are the little snippets of time catching up with those whom I've taught before last year while moving from one place to another - in my case, from the staff room to the computer lab and back. Bumped into Bryan and Jerry the other day after school... Had a little chat with Shaun and Mingxuan yesterday... met Wayne and the rest of the class while walking to the lab today... there's a little tinge of a pity that I didn't get to teach them longer last year - it's like you're just starting to warm up to them in two months and you'll have to end it there and then. There's a possibility of taking them for two weeks next term... definitely looking forward to that. :)

Stupid as it sounds... I really hope that one day I'll be able to take a form class and spend more time knowing the students. Hahaha... it's already a miracle that I'll soon be working on a full time capactiy... so I shall not push things too far.

As He leads bah. :)

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I thought of jotting this down yesterday after a really good experience with my first class... the way they were engaged in the midst of the lesson was unbelievable... and when I left them to work on their own for the second period, there was near complete silence... and by the end of the lesson, almost all of them had handed up their assignment.

Really different from the same class the previous year round... both of which bears the first letter of my name. Haha. I had fun... and I was heartened.

They're the class with full submission of the previous assignment. As I looked through the class lists, another class stood out in contrast, with only about half of them having submitted the previous assignment.

And that was the class I took this morning.

I was actually asking Pa for grace and joy, that He'll prepare me for the two classes today... and remembering telling Him that no matter what I'll just do my best.

I already had an inkling as they shuffled into the computer lab... and as they gathered in front of the projector screen, I popped the question.

I asked if they're the sports class.

A resounding yes was what I got... with quite a bulk from track and field and a handful from gym. Very cheeky boys who most probably did not find any meaning in what they were learning. They might had spent the entire lesson ridiculing the lesson or me for that matter... but yeah. I had fun too... a different kind of fun I guess.

But I know I'm definitely disheartened. Yeah... but not discouraged. I just thought that even as student atheletes they could and should very well put in their best in both.

And the way they projected themselves... they have the potential of pushing away even teachers who genuinely want to know them and work with them.

Three more lessons with them... as well as with the other classes. We'll see how it turns out.

:)

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"Aspire to Inspire before you Expire"

That's the motto of LEE Community College, the place where I spent the past year studying my diploma in counseling psychology. I must say that I've learned much, not just in the areas of clinical psychology, but more so from the humanistic approach that the lectures had been held throughout the months.

Today marks the end of this leg of journey... and yeah, I can never imagine how He's letting the many bits and pieces fall into place, in a way where things become a little clearer. Past experiences are never wasted; even those many times I lamented over myself as a shy introvert, all the struggles I went through... they all happened for a reason.

And they remind me of God's grace every time I think of them.

:)

Working amongst youths has its share of ups and downs. I'm thankful for the privilege to serve in my church's youth ministry (called WEB - Where Eternity Begins), where I got to experience growth alongside the ministry, which was pretty much in its new infancy phase when I joined five years ago.

There were more downs than ups in the initial stages, partly because of my lack of experience, and also partly because of a lack of interest on the youths' part. They began to grow along the way, not just physically but more so spiritually... and it came a point in time when I would get really excited every time I caught a glimpse of a little fruit growing here and there.

Just last Sunday morning, my heart was touched twice - once during no. 2's sharing, and another one in the midst of worship led by Peter. For all the growth that came about in their lives, I give thanks and am strengthened in faith to know that He's slowly but surely working in their lives.

My role as an elder brother and spiritual leader calls me to encourage and disciple... and unless God moves in their lives and touches them to want to know Him more and live out that living relationship, there's really nothing I can do.

Except to pray.

To lift up those burdens.

And believe in God's sovereignty.

If I were to be the old me, I would have fretted much over the two of them who got themselves involved in gangs, who've stopped coming, the one who's so caught up with all things in school that he's not coming anymore, who's been avoiding calls and messages... but more so I believe, who's simply drifting away from Him. And then there's the one whose self esteem's one that I was pretty much acquainted with, so much that it's hindering him from being used as a mighty instrument... the one who still finds it hard to make friends, the one whose mannerisms may cause him to find it hard still to fit into society, the one lacking in confidence, love... the one guilt striken... those who cry themselves to sleep... the ones who're just so indifferent.

And then I'm reminded that my name is Galvin, not God.

Now I realise that those feelings I used to feel... He's just showing me a little of how He's feeling. And by His grace, He's allowing me to channel all these back to Him now in the form of supplications, to know that He holds each of them dearly in His heart and hand.

And for whoever He's allowed our paths to cross, that I'll continue to be empowered to be that leader, brother and friend that He's called me to be.

And yeah... now that He's crafted my secular portfolio to be amongst youths as well, I can only say... that youth days will just get more interesting by the year. :)

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from: In Loving Memory of Thaddeus Cheong

"thad was my best friend, my training partner, my source of inspiration. we did everything together. overseas races and trips, fishing trips, movie dates, dinner/lunch dates. everything and anything. you shithead. beat me to heaven. you said we'll be there for each other, through thick and thin. now you pang se me. i'm gonna box you the next time i see you. oh man thad. remember the shit we pulled in our trips? yeah. kukup and afamosa was like one of the best! how we pulled each other during training? yeah? and i still owe you $20. hope you're not taking interest, cos i'm gonna be broke if you do that. remember our last fishing trip? on monday 18jun? we were like baking ourselves lah. helping each other rub tanning oil on each other's back. making the deck all so oilly!! and you! stupid. played with my cube with your oily hands. well, i placed that cube in your coffin. burnt it with you. take good care of it okay?? cos when i join you, i also wanna play with it! and guess what? we were supposed to watch transformers today.. and i did! i got 2 tickets! one for you, one for me. hope you enjoyed it. the story line was okok. but the special effects were great! well, the last show we officially watched was ocean 13 with pat remember? and we were supposed to watch fan4 on father’s day but you had some lunch in the end:( thad i'll always remember you as my best friend, my brother. you better keep fit in heaven, cos our race for sea games aint over yet." - dexter

Grief... a real process to go through at the loss of someone dear.

Hope... of a reunion in eternity that's assured, though can't be seen for now but by faith.

I remember Blenheim, who went with the Lord at a tender age of 19 in 2005.

There's Samuel, the sec 4 boy from St. Hilda's who was taken home last September.

Memories may fade but legacies get passed on.

Blenheim, Samuel, Thaddeus... they all have something in common.

At such tender ages, it may sound as a consolation that their "work is complete" here on earth. But there is nothing further from this truth, no matter how much it sounds like a consolation.

They were ordinary teenagers with the same kind of stresses and struggles thrown at them in their teenage life. Even in their walk with God, I'm sure they'd experienced the ups and downs but nonetheless a real and living relationship.

But look at the legacies and impacts they'd made within their circles of friends and beyond.

And the hope is that they're all home.

And one day I will be too. Same goes for the rest of my family... my brothers and sisters whom I've come to know so dearly as well.

All back home with the One who loves us the most, with one another who believed.

Till then, may we all continue to live our lives to the fullest, passing it on all that we've received.