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Yeah... somehow, this is how I've been feeling of late.

Can't find myself to be properly engaged with people... don't really know why.

The good thing is that Char and I have decided to join a cellgroup and grow together. :)

I hope the juices will return so I can populate this place once again.

I know it's unbecoming.. but sometimes I still do feel a tinge of the past me asking "Who cares?"

I realised that more and more I won't be able to find that fulfilling feeling at work.

I realised that most of the joy the past years at work were derived from teaching the boys in the classrooms.

The nature of my work now... it doesn't give opportunity for me to have shared common experiences with the students. And when that doesn't happen... it basically means that I won't have much opportunities to connect (ah, maybe that's one of the reasons why I'm feeling like that these days).

Really glad for Char who's having a sec one form class, teaching them english, literature and moral education. That's a hefty number of periods with her students each week! They have class bonding time some more! Haha... envious la.

Which brings me to the crossways again. If I am to take up the teaching path, it would mean several more years of studying... well. Sometimes I really don't know where God is leading in all these. But as I look back from time to time, I am reminded that the fact that I'm in my alma mater working in such a capacity (wash toilet, make coffee...), it is in itself a miracle.

Preparations for the wedding is underway as well... guestlist has been quite a headache! Haha... just hoping that we'll have a comfortable runway till that day comes. Decided to ask some of my students to help as ushers... and every "yes" came as an encouragement. :)

Aye. I'll count my blessings and give thanks once again for a re-start. :P