0

With the permission from my wife, I'm currently in bed with my laptop writing this entry while she goes to sleep first. Thought I should jot down all these when things are still fresh in mind... including the emotions. By that, I don't mean I'm writing this under an intense emotional state... quite on the contrary, what I'm about to write is the product of the process of having gone through such a state... after I've gotten things sorted out, more or less. So... here goes.

The Commencement Dinner for the Batch of 2006-2009 Hwa Chong Institution (High School) came and went by in the blink of an eye at the Hilton Hotel just now. As much as it was a significant event to many, if not all, of the students who were there, it was too, to me. 2006 was the first year I re-entered my alma mater; I had the privilege of interacting with half of the secondary one cohort then for a period of a term or so. Subsequently was given the opportunity to interact with half the cohort once again two years later in their upper secondary years, with closer interaction with some of them in the capacity of a project or an affective mentor.

It has been both a sweet and a bittersweet experience with this very first batch... but I don't regret the way I've poured my energies into them, though I must confess that I seriously don't think I have that kind of physical and more importantly, the emotional capacity to do so for the subsequent ones. Well... till I get myself better attuned to my inner workings I guess! Haha...

Sweet because... even as a non-subject teaching 'teacher', even though there are no concrete 'exam' results to gauge if what you've been doing and teaching has indeed proven beneficial to the students' growth, I take their return of gratitude as a temporal indicator and feedback to know that they've at least gotten hold of something. A better indicator would definitely come in the years to come, in junior college for the short run, and in life for the long, when the roots are firmly anchored and when the trees have more or less grown up. For now, I've got to say that I've been surprised many a times by the wonderful gestures from some of them, some whom I've not had the chance to interact more with since their sec one days. Some of them wrote really heartfelt words (ie specfic, non-cliche) for my wedding and for teachers' day; some gave a little gift each year without fail.

Bittersweet because... there would be some who would make you feel that you're pouring water through a broken cistern; you don't exactly see results and you don't receive any form of an indicator at best... and at its worst, it makes you feel that all things said and done were in vain.

This post is dedicated to all the students in this batch who've made a positive difference in me through my stint these past few years. The songs presented at the dinner together with the montage - both were written specifically for such a time as the dinner, and it's definitely something original and belonging solely to the batch of 2006 - 2009.

It is inevitable to be losing a part of the familiarity you sense in school next year as this batch moves on over to the college section. Maybe it's something that veteran teachers have gotten used to... or maybe it's just the sentimental me. Even in the Boarding Programme, things are definitely not going to be the same. I already have an inkling as to who are the ones who would probably keep in touch when all the structures have been taken away... and who would move on and not return. Then again, I should just let time tell... (:

Okay it's finally time for bed. Originally wanted to come out with a list of students who've made me feel the work that I'm on and at as worthwhile... but I think that would take quite a substantial amount of time to do so... so I'll leave that out for now. Will write in time to come! :)

So... this is it. Thanks for the times!

1

Dear Galvin,

Congratulations! Your entry was among the winners of the FFWD>>safety Pantopicon splashpage competition. We enjoyed a lot your original entry. Your work is on showcase on our splashpage at http://www.pantopicon.be.

As you know, we have also posted the next FFWD>> assignment (http://www.pantopicon.be/ffwd), which deals with the theme of work. Feel free to participate and let your creative friends know!

Best wishes,

the pantopicon team

8

I initially designed the "He Didn't Have To" shirt in an attempt to reclaim the area of "shirts with a message"... There're many designs in the market with Christian messages and connotations in them, but for many, the emphasis has been placed on the design aspects so much that the message gets tweeked or diminished. For others, the design aspects get compromised and what's left may not exactly appeal... to the wearer and to the people seeing the shirts. Mustard Seed Shirts attempts to sow seeds of salvation and growth through aptly designed shirts and apparels with straight forward messages that people will understand at first glance.

As this is a self managed ministry, there are not enough funds for the pre-printing of shirts for sale. If you are interested in purchasing any of the shirts below, send an email to galvin@worshipsingapore.com with the following particulars:

• Your Name


• Your FULL Address


• Shirt IDs, Sizes and Quantities


• Your Email Address


• Your Contact Number

You will receive a confirmation reservation slip as soon as your order is processed. Each shirt design will have a specific order quota before it is sent to the printers for printing. When the quota is reached (you can check out the progress here from time to time), a payment request email will be sent to you. You will then be required to make payment (through internet banking or paypal - details will be given in the request email) before the shirts get printed. After which, your order will either be delivered (locally) or posted to you as soon as they are printed.

The first edition of "He Didn't Have To" has been sold out. Approximately 500 pieces (both the blue and grey versions) has been sold throughout the course of the year 2004 - it was used as a camp shirt for Varsity Christian Fellowship's Annual Freshman Orientation Camp and also as a fund raiser shirt at Raffles Junior College's Carnival 2004. Currently, it awaits its first reprint as soon as the quota is reached.

"SOul WHAT?"

Price
S$15 (for sales in Singapore / Malaysia)
US$10 (for elsewhere)

Quota for printing
10 / 300, 290 more orders needed

Sizes available
XS, S, M, L, XL, XXL

Order Information

"He Didn't Have To"

Price
S$15 (for sales in Singapore / Malaysia)
US$10 (for elsewhere)

Quota for printing
3 / 300, 297 more orders needed

Sizes available
XS, S, M, L, XL, XXL

Order Information

3

Hope to get this out in time. Heh.

1

Tomorrow's the final submission for the last module for this academic year.

Got back my other module's result - the essay writing and small project one.

Truth being... I was genuinely surprised. Two modules down... one last one to go. A hat trick will be quite hard... but nevertheless possible.

To the praise of His glory.

3

I've just completed the Corporate Manual for the company... a product resulting from two whole days and nights worth of eye bulging and gluing-to-screen. Just need to bring it down to have it ring-binded... then it's time to redo some of the packagings, firm up the stationery, redo the point-of-purchase, chalk up the "research"... the last one which I'm not really interested in doing. Next tuesday... gonna give my best shot.

Who knows... one of these days the cafe will really be opened?

:)

0

This entry is not an attempt to chalk up design related writings for my process journal.

It's just that... in the midst of looking through the design books at the little fair that Basheer (design bookstore) set up at Lasalle, I found myself drawn into the "wanting to reference other people's work" mode... and with the upcoming student awards competition, I can really sense the "thinkquest" in me resurfacing again. It's really a different kind of feeling... and this time round, it's so much more meaningful to give myself that extra push... :)

But first, I better clear all my school and external projects... heh.

And oh... it's my first time really buying design books... you know, as in, really... :)

I know I can afford better articulation. Hahahaha.

0

See... I was supposed to hand this "process journal" up next week for checking and marking. All along, the entire class had this inkling that the process journal's made up of writings and doodlings of things related to the projects that we've been doing... and the thing is, I really don't have much materials to do so.

After speaking to Vincente today, it's just like seeing a bright light at the end of a dark tunnel...

And it turned out... that it's always been something that I've wanted to do.

I'm putting what I've written and doodled and recorded and whatever-ed over the past four - five months into a nicely designed package... and it shall be done so in the future every few months. WooT... WOOT!!!!!!! :D

AND THAT IS MY PROCESS JOURNAL AS A CREATIVE PERSONNEL! WOOT!

Hahaha... but I know I ought to put up some design related posts in time to come... it's unjustifiable that I'm studying communications design and yet writing so little about it... hmm. Whatever. :P

Papa You are so good... Papa You are so so good... :)

1

Yup... very hard indeed.

Very... very hard.

People think that I'm siao (crazy)... because after all that I'm still smiling... hahahah. :P

What do you think happened?

I was late for project workcheck this morning... and as a result, my works were barred for evaluation. That sounded pretty okay right... but to put it more bluntly... I'm given a fail for my mid sem workcheck. Together with Sab who was late as well, we went to find Pat the program leader... but she wouldn't budge. It's alright with me... because I've always looked up to the professionalism she displays. So yea... no display of works... no evaluation... equating to failing workcheck. Yup.

OH NO... THIS IS MY FIRST ACADEMIC FAILURE IN MY WHOLE ENTIRE LIFE!!!!

Eh... actually not... I failed quite a number of my further math papers back in junior college... hur hur.

Looks like I've got to find one of the tutors individually and have my works evaluated... not for the marks though - that's set in place. Have to get them checked because the final marking will be done by an external panel at the end of the semester. Still... though a failure in this workcheck wouldn't affect the final grade to a great extent... it's still a blemish... I'm sure they'll keep a record of this. Oh well... looks like I have to do something to my perpetual lateness... this is indeed a lesson learnt the hard way...

The yakun toast breakfast with Charu and Sab at Funan was a consolation I guess... okay Sab I promise I'll go visit your bunny one of these days... and Charu, I still want that indian vege meal at your place... hahaha. :P

Shall pop by the post office and collect the package GPP sent... wonder what it is... hmmm... Then back home to clear up the mess I've made in my room... then hit the sacks.

Did I mention that I didn't sleep again yesterday night? That shall be the last time in many months though... I hope. :)

Should have read today's Daily Bread earlier:

"After studying the behavior of thousands of cell-phone users, James Katz, a professor of communication at Rutgers University, has concluded that the cell phone has changed the nature of the way we think of time. Researchers now speak of the US as living in "soft time." This term has been coined to describe the thinking of a cell-phone user who calls at 8:20 to say he will be late for the 8:30 meeting, arrives at 8:45, and considers himself on time because he called ahead. Unlike us, God is always on time...."

Alright... alright... *plucks hair from head*

*botak*

(well...)

Heard that there's this girl who was also late... who later went to take an MC and submitted her work.

Well...

Integrity sounds nicer... no? Hmm.

:)

1

Okay... Galvin is seh(3) seh(2) (fainty) after a night of seeing red... cause I'm using two shades of red and white as my corporate colours... heh, pretty patriotic eh? :P Quite pleased with the results... let's see the comments given during the critique later. Considering how I spent most of the time reading blogs and writing Friendster testimonials... I'm super thankful that I'm able to complete the four items with the desired effects. And as always... thank You Papa for sustaining me. Okay. Off to school I go! :)

2

Photoshoot In The City

Got to wake up super darn early this morning for the photoshoot in town... we were to meet at the bus stop near the padang before moving off in clusters... Planned to meet Charu at the burger king in Raffles City... it was still closed when I reached.... the only outlet that had opened was Subway... and so I went to order a meatball sub... woohoo. :)

I was listening to my player... Was playing songs from Jars of Clay.... but I was sure I had my earphones down while ordering... and there... I heard clearly from the background "This Road" by Jars of Clay being played from the "kitchen" area of the outlet. My first thought was mmm... that's like... a modern hymn? HMMM????? Then suddenly, my vision was fixed upon the cahier counter... a wooden cross! WOO! WOW!

And Dori called me after youth service today and told me that she heard "The Power Of Your Love" playing at the new Subway outlet at Far East! WOO! WOW! What is happening here... :P

And it's rising up... all around... it's the anthemn of the Lord's renown.....

:)

The photoshoot was fun though we had to walk quite a bit... but hey, the first time we've gotten a class photo taken... even though it was full attendance... heh. And man... I never knew I could have used up three rolls of film... that means 36 x 3 = 108 shots! Wanted to go home earlier (the whole day's been a huge rush)... but ended up right on the dot instead.

Guoren arrived immediately after I stepped into my house... that's quite a perfect timing ya. Was very encouraged by his sharing... and the song he wrote... which I had the privilege of being the first one to listen apart from Papa... and immediately we went into unplugged recording. It's been like... three years since the Lobby Sessions we had in church where we'll just pull out the instruments and vocals and record right on the spot? Heh... the words... from his heart... they minister loads to me. I'll do a cover version soon bro when the time permits. :)

And the testimony given by 7-Days (formerly Forerunners)... man. Didn't know Pat speaks such good mandarin! WOO... :P And the worship... and to see the guys genuinely wanting to serve... and above that wanting to change and be broken... and the dinner conversation with Peter & Jaymond...

Okay... the need to rush through the project now... this spoils everything. Hai... supposed to attend the cook out session with Jason and the rest at his place... but well. TMSC's having a stayover at Rayz's place... think I'll pop by to stay over IF I can finish some work on time... heh. For now... a quick shower and a huge rush into the work... Papa let me finish a substantial amount today okay? Please... please please please please please.... :P

BE YOUR LIGHT
Written by Teo Guoren

I know, that You’re by my side
I know, that You’ll be with me
Though times, I’ll be afraid
I pray that You’ll shine through me

Lord of my life, I’ll give my all to You always
Here I am Jesus, use me as Your instrument
Though I’m small Lord, let me shine for You always
Cos I want to be Your light unto the world

You gave Your life for me
And I want to live for You always
Lord, pave the way for me
Let me be Your light

At times, I know I’ll grow weary
But Lord, let me live by Your strength
Let Your fire burn in me
Oh Lord, set me apart

Jesus, there’s one desire
Just to be with You my King
I want to serve You, my Lord
I’ll obey... I’ll obey

Let me be Your light

1

Raffles City & Esplanade Any-O-How-Shoot

One spur of the moment could lead to a total change of schedule. :P

Was on the way home on the bus... when I suddenly felt like taking photos in preparation for the saturday's photoshoot for my photography workshop... and since I was in the area... was thinking... why not? And so alighted the bus, flipped out the trusty digital camera and set off to work. Fun time... :P But man, I ended up spending the next couple of hours entirely in town...

Walked to Raffles City after the photoshoot... wanted to get one of those Nike bands... and so went in search for Nike shops and any other sports shops... couldn't find any, got langa-ed (stuck) at the Acts Christian Lifestyle Bookstore instead browsing through literature for quite some time... then walked around a bit some more... then popped by Gramaphone, the cd shop opposite St Andrew's Cathedral where GPP got the Corrine May albums (wo chi le yi bu... haiz). Browsed around... and came across this vcd which I bought at just $8.90 - "Dead Poet's Society". It's a very old movie by Robin Williams... somehow the title conjured in me something that's dark and sinister... not until I read the sypnosis. I think I'm going to like the movie a lot... it now depends on when I'll have the time to watch it. Hahaha... :P And not to mention, it's one of Ps Ed's favouritest films when he teaches about some values or something... if I didn't remember wrongly... heh. :)

Decided to take a bus home... but when the bus pulled over at the stop opposite Far East, my instincts told me to alight... which I did. Hahaha... and I continued the hunt for the ding dong band... Strolled around Far East... then opposite to the Nike shop... found one in a package... didn't get it. Later found out from Rayz that they can be bought for seven bucks for three at Queensway... hmm... shall pop by that place one of the days after school. :)

Popped by the Apple shop at Wheellock Place to whet my appetite... they have the boxes of the 30" cinematic screen monitors... man they're H-U-G-E.... hahahahah. But nah... not now. Perhaps when I'm in my final year or something... shall see... shall see.

Boarded another bus... this time round it brought me back home. Hahahaha... :P

7

Presale orders... anyone? :D

0

Thank You Papa for getting me excited over the term project... thank You for allowing me to wake up earlier than usual to start on idea generation and ending up with some nice sketches and ideas... it'll be so cool to see all these drawings come alive in its three dimensional form... WooT! And though I'm not going to arrive in school half an hour earlier to read the Word and proclaim the verse over it, Papa come see my heart... and You know what I'm going to do already. :P

It's good to be free... It's good to be free from all the pain
It's good to be free... It's good to hear You say my new name
It's good to be free... It's good to know
You have stood in the place of blame for me...
Yeah yeah yeah yeah...
It's good to be free. :P

0

As the Chinese aphorism goes, time passes with a turn of the eye. Eeks. What a sinister translation. Ah well, as long as my message gets put across. The point I'm trying to make is that I've been a lazy bonehead for the past twenty-hour hours and that I've done nothing much but to reach my percentage quota for ThinkQuest.

I'm beginning to hate Sundays. Hope the 16th arrives soon.

Even my mouse decided to go against me. As punishment, I tore out its left ear. I, too, can be merciless. The wriggling remnant lies cold against the flatbed scanner right in front of me. The next best thing I can do is to press against its right ear from now on. I'm too poor to get myself another one. Sigh. I'll be rendered useless should the right ear malfunctions as well.

I'll leave you with a poem. Finally.

**********

Universal Transient

Just a traveler in this vast
world of emotions and empathy,
of many dimensions, you and me
being trapped seemingly in
one of them

Spins round and round
till infinity, you and me,
we shall see the light from within
Our predestined heritage, history
and pristine records of humanity

Bite the dust and off we'll be
in another endless flow
of time seeping by
Frolicking ends short
in a mindless, pointless stop

[Crap... total crap!]

**********

Thinkquest Status
[OOOOOOOOOOOO...............] 60.0%
Could have done more

Food of the Day
Sweet & Sour Fish Rice

Colour of the Day
Inevitably, I'm back to black.

0

Cacophony brews up in the background
while reticence dominates the fore -
a juxtaposition of living peace and war.
Hey you, don't you dare unfurl a frown

Cause this ain't a poem
to be read at the podium
Just a frivolous attempt of mine
to make nonsensical things rhyme

Guess that does it. Ho ho ho.
(Eeks. Reminds me of the Milo ads. Or was it Holicks?? ARGH! Or was it Ovaltine?? Did I get the spellings right? ARGH! Why am I so paranoid today...)

Da. Da da da dum. Da. Da da da dum. Da da, Euuuu. Heh. An affinity to Fann Wong's songs wouldn't do me any good. Credit goes out to the composer/s. Ah. I'm forcing myself to lie. Indeed, Fann's vocal ability increased at least ten-fold, the way I see it. The catchy tunes entice me to play them over and over again. Fann haters out there, don't hate her too much alright? Compared to the rest of the TCS "singers" (Okay okay, I'll exclude dear Evelyn, cause I enjoy her songs as well. Heh.), Fann deserves a certain amount of credibility. Am I not wrong (perfect example of anti-summary skills. Duh.)? Luv Luv Luv...

He who paces sluggishly out of the Lecture Theatre after Double Math Test II depicts a born loser. Apparently, the questions were nothing but simple regurgitation from the tutorials. Being a born loser, this unrepentant fellow fails to listen to advice and finish all the tutorials, hence suffers tremendously under the constant beating of the cold air from the gargantuan air shaft hovering directly above his brain-fried container. He who fares badly has got nothing else to say about the issue. He who has got nothing to say anticipates the Physics Test next week. O'er his dead body he's going to do badly again, he mumbles unconsciously.

It appears that the song we sang for the audition sounded muffled, as commented by the teacher judging it. Ah. This shows disunity among ourselves then. How? There is no how. Either we get into the finals and we put our hearts and souls in it or we do not get into the finals and we let the song settle in the dust. The later realisation would be pretty cruel to our hard work eh? Close your eyes, look upon the shooting star and pray. If there is one. Either way, I think it would be cool to have it as our official CT song, changing the lyrics here and there. As a matter of fact, the lyrics fit in perfectly well! Hmmm... and maybe we can compose an English version of it as well. Hehe.

Humpf. Targeted deadline for completion of my ThinkQuest project is only two days away. I'm stuck with thirty percent of work done. I'll need a sudden burst of energy today to elevate the percentage by another twenty. Well. I definitely hope so. But I feel so haggard now. Haven't slept since twelve midnight. I'm ready to doze off anytime.

The Island Awakens

Shines upon
the break of dawn
Upon the lawn
Luscious jade springs
Web of life woven strings
River of soul sets the fringe
Island awakes thee
Where the air is free

**********

Thinkquest Status
[OOOOOOOO...................] 30.0%

Food of the Day
(Tender Fresh) Lemon Chicken Rice.

Colour of the Day
Pale Orange

0

Ah. I actually learned a new noun that represents me wholesomely. I'm a nebbish! A timid, meek, ineffectual person! HAHA! Nah.. just kidding.

Nothing special on today. The suicidal talk wasn't of much interest. The speaker's oratorical skill was left much to my disgust. Not that I could muster up enough courage to stand in front and speak, but the speaker iterated her points so much so that it made me feel irritated. I was showing respect by staying awake. Hee. You don't need people to instill common sense into yourself, do you? Tell me when you contemplate suicide. Maybe I can offer you some guidance from Mr. Suicidalopus. Heeh.

I find myself getting more and more acquainted with the school library. Never thought I would treat it as a hangout till the beginning of this term. It's really a very conducive place for homework and all your reading pleasures, a place for chao muggers. Me? Nah... Me no chao mugger.. Me perfumed one... Hehe. You should have known it earlier than I, cause I'm always the last to realise something is good. Did my differentiation revision in it. The air conditioner should have been a little bit cooler though.

Talking about Math... Mr Chan Kok Leong is back to lecture us! Weird though. Seemed to absorb more readily. And how cool it was for him to give us so many tips on the Double Math test happening this Saturday! Now I feel much more confident, knowing what types of questions will be asked. Heh. Maybe I do have a chance in passing the test. =)

Well. Mdm Yeo's lesson was equally grueling as of any other day's. One can die of plain boredom. That's for those who don't bother with her tutorials. Stttooooop. Clarification. Not that I didn't want to bother, the tutorials were just too hard on me. Today the tutorials took another step and morphed from alien hieroglyphics to encrypted non-existent codes. A blank piece of paper would be much more interesting to look at. Nevertheless, I'll try to finish three Math tutorials today, for I need to pass my test this Saturday.

Yeah. About classroom cleanliness. This is way too unfair for us! Classes who patronise our love and pride mess around and trample on it. Tissue papers littered everywhere and tainted window panes. As if it was left to nature's hands for god knows how many billion years. Those classes should exercise some self discipline. We keep our classroom clean every week and it turns out mucky with ancient dirt every week without fail. Maybe we should learn how to dirty other people's classes as well... Hehe.. Oh. Evil evil. *grin* Nah. Would I do such a thing?

Completed my exercise routine. What a great feeling! I feel so thin! Well, like what Mingwei said, I'll be if I believe in myself. So here's to my sub consciousness. Cheers!

They sky experiences a wonderfully breath taking sunset. Heard from Mom that a comet had exploded. Now the sky boasts a myriad of mystifying colours edging towards the tints of orange. Awesome.

I'll end this entry with this piece of poetry inspired by my feelings. Duh. Wonder what'll happen to the presentation on Friday. Hopefully it'll turn out well.

**********

Friends

(I)
Met and forged
what we call a bond in
the name of fate. Substantiated
mutual understanding served as
the adhesive mandatory to
our very existence.

We would study together,
laugh in cohesion
and call each other
for the sole purpose of catching up
in the light of care and concern.

Perhaps one day this force will weaken,
but we know it's just
a matter of reinforcement.
A tint of you will always reside
in the heart of my cerebrum should
you decide to let go. Friends forever
is but a myth, a legend, a hoax.

Cherish our friendship,
my friend.

(II)
Some of us come and go
like commuters on the road.
Gush of wind too fast
it's hard to catch.
We've been together so long
it's really hard to believe
that we do not and would not want to
know one another more.

A common front brought us together
in the midst of confusion. Now that
it's gone, we go
on our separate ways
and even if we meet, we come upon
as total strangers on the road.

A greeting would be nice.

(III)
A mythical force links us together
though we hardly know one another
This is what the beginning brings -
a series of hellos and byes followed by
gradual inclinations.

(IV)
We may not know each other
but time will tell.

**********

Thinkquest Status
[OOOOOOOO...................] 30.0%

Food of the Day
Spaghetti. That guy gave an "underdose".
And it cost two bucks.

Colour of the Day
Black Black Black...

0

Morn began with the notebook failure. Switching on the power, the dreaded "Invalid System Disk" message flashed the screen. Threw me into a flurry state at 2am. Apprehension told me that the hard disk had met with a grave mishap. Kept my optimism brewing and slotted in the Rescue CD. Ah. I had to reformat the entire disk and reinstall everything over again. At least the hard disk didn't spoil. In the midst of reformatting, I dozed off with my glasses on.

The knocking on my door woke me up at 6am. Dad wanted his CD player back. Checked the notebook and realised it'd ran out of battery. Luckily the reformatting and reinstallation had completed. Too lazy to connect it back to the AC source. Dizzy spells drove me back to sleep.

Woke up at 11am when Mom and Sis were about to leave. Installed Dungeon Keeper II successfully. Grin disappeared just as the starting screen reverted back to the windows screen. Tried launching the game again, same result. I guess I'm not fated with a lot of games. Last time it was Star Wars Racer, which needed a 3D Accelerator which I don't possess. Now I don't even know where the problem lies. Brought it to the notebook and tried. Same thing. ARGH.

I swear I'll never play games anymore.

Off to improve my writing. Nice to know you, Dennis. :)

**********

I Am Gone

Will life go on as usual
in this place I call my home?

Will you grace my funeral
and shower upon my tomb?

Will you flip through the journal
secretly tucked in my room?

Will you ever remember
the things we always assume?

The things we deem are best
The things we live for
The things we do with zest
The things which make us soar

Now that I'm gone
There's no need to mourn

Treat me as a passing wind
Cascades down your skin

For I am gone

**********

Thinkquest Status
[OOOOOOOO...................] 30.0%

Food of the Day
Mushroom Soup

Colour of the Day
Black stays.

0

'Tis a Sunday. I'm feeling extremely sleepy. In the midst of my bluriness, I stumbled upon the lyrics of "Shakespeare In Love". Finally.

I have no drive to do anything 'cept to rot away at the moment. Guess I'll wait till tonight before I continue with ThinkQuest again. Sigh... The targeted deadline is only fourteen days away...

Anyways. I really do hope I can get into the finals again. Pardon me if I sound too materialistic, but I will never have the chance to fly again if I fail to get in. Man shouldn't invent money. Really.

Money drives people nuts. It's a wedge that tears everything apart. The overlord of super species, it possess the unnatural abilities to ignite squabbles, create false imageries and ultimately kill. Why then did people invent such a monstrous evil doer? To err is human. To err again is still human. What's more to say?

I'm contemplating if I should go catch "Two Days One Night". Nobody seems to be interested. I'm in the Science faculty remember. Most probably I'll just forget about it.

I actually pissed someone off. From the bottom of my heart, I sincerely apologise. Not that I'm lazy, not that I'm irresponsible (to a great extent), but I guess our meeting will prove unfruitful today. I shall complete my presentation, finish up the script and get it done and over with. I'm a sinner. Does that make me any thinner?

I'm overwhelmed and so disappointed in myself. I trudged to the meeting place (aka Kelv's house) in defeat. Pressed the bell umpteen times and received no response. Thought of leaving for home. I persisted, called him and got myself into his house. Malfunctioning bells. Duh.

I'm glad I went. Had such a wonderful time there and came back with Dungeon Keeper II. Heh. I'm so glad I looked so natural on video. Guilty conscience at work I reckoned, but it seemed that I acted doubly well. Keep in mind I'm a camera shy guy.

Took the long way home. Blasted the 3EB album as the bus took its toll along the darkening road. Absorbed a few pages of "Dress Gray" along the way.

Here's a little nonsensical poem dedicated to the little cute ant I saw on the bus. I hope my writing improves soon. There are millions of younger people out there who write a zillion times better than me. Inferior complex shows. Discontinuing Word of the Day. I'm being selfish here. Heh.

**********

The Ant

Dons an armor
luminous red
Lingers along
the tints of grey
Ponders about
the road ahead
The lighter shade
appeals

A stolid front
it manifests
Troops forward
in solitude
Into the light
it crawls
The lighter shade
appeals

Reaches a hill
five-fingered
Down the first trench
a soft tremble
Magnitude intensifies
a sudden jerk
The lighter shade
it flies

(Absurdity at its best)

Thinkquest Status
[OOOOOOOO...................] 30.0%

Food of the Day
McChicken Meal

Colour of the Day
Black stays.

0

Well, not really. Let's maintain some solemnity shall we? Ah, I've come to reach a paradox too soon. How shall I continue? Let's find some irony in life shall we? Hey! The sun rose at night! Duh.

Pardon my crappiness.

The Computing test was a breeze, that is, from what I see. I managed to crap my way through! Thought Section A would be the pits. Alas, alas. Wrote more than a page for each question! Wow! Applause!

I'm tainted with crappiness. Mucky mucky...

Didn't collect much SV fund this morning. In fact, I only managed haul a hefty fifteen dollars, which amounted to only one person paying. Here's the catch - That person wasn't me! Sorta expected isn't it?

Something truly interesting happened today. I actually whirled myself into a squabble which yours truly emerged victorious! Hah Kelv Kelv... you lose!! KO! =)

I do think that all these minute happenings really perk me up. Else everything would be dull as scorched earth. Barren land exposed to immense solar radiation resulting in, well, barren land. The cycle continues till rain finally decides to pay a visit.

And the cycle continues, this time taking a right turn towards the dreadful jungle of numbers and indices. "Me no failure, me now go study for da test". Notice it's within parenthesis.

Didn't do much for ThinkQuest today. Actually, I did none. Fatigue overwrites everything. It rules my body and mind. Now that I realised, maybe I should retire early and wake up refreshed for intensive indulgence tomorrow. Adios.

**********

Nothingness

The beating sun shines
upon the exposed body
What do you really see?

Wake me up sombre
and cover my eyes with dust
Thou shan't see nothing

Summer rain gently
sweeps the fireball away
I still see nothing

Soon the night falls
into depths of darkness lure
Could nothing be seen?

The cycle repeats
A continuous process
What's there to be seen?

Thinkquest Status
[OOOOOOOO...................] 30.0%

Food of the Day
Nachos and a Dog

Colour of the Day
Black again. I guess it's getting permanent.

Word of the Day
Brought to you by Merriam-Webster Inc.

deipnosophist \dipe-NAHS-uh-fist\ (noun)
:a person skilled in table talk

Example sentence: "What this dinner party needs is a deipnosophist who could interject some brilliant dialog to save us from terminal boredom," sighed Leonard.

Did you know?
Next time you are at a dinner party, you might want to try working "deipnosophist" into the conversation to impress the other guests with your sparkling vocabulary. When they ask where the term comes from, calmly explain that it is taken from the title of the _Deipnosphistai_, a 15-volume work written by Greek grammarian Athenaeus in the third century. The deipnosophists of Athenaeus are learned guests at a banquet whose table talk, presented as a series of lengthy quotations from about 800 authors, covers subjects from poetry and grammar to food and philosophy. The work's title is the plural of the Greek "deipnosophistes," itself a combination of "deipnon" (meaning "meal") and "sophistes" (meaning "wise man" or "sophist").

0

I have this feeling everytime I'd gone through an extended certain period of time staying at home all alone (parents and sister aside) all day without attending school. Simply put, the semester holidays. No, I'm definitely not an introvert, neither am I an extrovert. Ah. I'm "uncategorised". Didn't feel like going out. Got sick of using the computer actually. But here I am punching the dirt-filled keyboard, gazing at the minute thirteen inch display. A mockery. A graphics designer with only a thirteen inch monitor. Maybe that's why I am so good(not), cause I never let my inspirations escape through the permeable membranes of the tiny box. You believed me? HAH.

I was miraculously cured by the air-con and a couple of left over pills in addition to a panadol pill which I managed to find after scavenging though the first aid box. Felt much much better. Sorry Doc, didn't give ya a chance to pounce on me this time. Guess I'd given too much to the doctor for the past few years. It's time I learn how to cure myself - physically and mentally. I should be more outgoing, go to movies more often, do some healthy window shopping with friends, blah... Somebody close my gap??

Remorseful. Yeah. Always had this feeling after the end of a semester holiday. Being ever so tangible, the feeling crawled through my body, devouring my inner self. Now I feel so demotivated. School starts in a couple of days and I've yet started slogging through the piles of homework. All a matter of time management. Can't help but blame myself. When will I ever learn?

Rongmin called me today. A routine call to update on ourselves. We talked about how simple his job as a clerk in Mindef is and then drifted on to the dreadful topic of Basic Military Training (affectionately known as BMT). I was telling him how antagonised I am currently for not completing my homework. At least I know I wouldn't feel that way when it's my turn for BMT. I wouldn't have a chance to slack at all. None at all. Maybe I should go break my toe... Heh. Just kidding. I look forward to the challenge. Well, not a hundred percent for now, but I definitely hope so.

**********

Emotions Run Wild

Running through the wilderness
caressing the soft spoken
winds, a kind of
natural fondness
deep rooted within
Hands upon the head
gently swirling,
feeling the breeze
inward twirling.

I long for this crazy day.

Thinkquest Status
[OOOO.......................] 3.5%

Food of the Day
Economical Rice Set

Colour of the Day
Black. Slack.

Word of the Day
Brought to you by Merriam-Webster Inc.

stentorian \stehn-TOHR-ee-uhn\ (adjective)
: extremely loud

Example sentence: "'To the battlements, ye loitering villains!' he exclaimed, raising his stentorian voice till the arches around rung again. . . ." (Sir Walter Scott, _Ivanhoe_)

Did you know?
Nobody ever had to ask the Greek herald Stentor to speak up. His voice always came through loud and clear. In fact, in the _Iliad_, Homer described Stentor as a man whose voice was as loud as that of fifty men together. Stentor's powerful voice made him a natural choice for delivering announcements and proclamations to the assembled Greek army during the Trojan War, and it also made his name a byword for any person with a loud, strong voice. Both the noun "stentor" and the related adjective "stentorian" pay homage to the big-voiced warrior, and both have been making noise in English since the early 17th century.

0

ARGH... I knew the dream the day before was an ill omen which brought about as much deleterious effects as I could thought of... And talking about Narcolepsy too... I guess it made me sick as well. Currently I'm in a terrible state of shock after visiting the loo for god knows a million times. Slowly, the diarrhea developed into a mild fever, and then a high fever, engulfing me in eternal suffering. Now I feel like vomiting. URGGHHHHH SPLAT SPLAT. Oh well.

Thought I could finish some homework today, but the illness bogged me down, rendering me useless, helpless. Tossing non stop in bed wasn't a very good idea, it elevated my temperature. Sleeping with air conditioning DOES help bring down my temperature. You wouldn't get to read this entry if not for the newly installed air conditioner. A million kow-tows. Dad grumbled all over when he saw the air con. I'm not sure, but from his callous face, I deduce I had to pay for the PUB bills for the air con myself. ARGH. It's going to chalk up quite an amount.

The time is 11:13pm. Being a sickly sapien, I ought to be in bed. Duh. Don't you find today's entry a little bit short? Humpf. I shall cook up a poem. My brain cells are depleting in a geometric progression fashion. Ouch. Too weak to remove the planet.

**********

Fever

You feel the world
crushing upon your
frail body, temperature
rising. A manifestation
of divine cruelty.

No difference with
a fatal heamorrhage.

The feeling palpable,
temperature soars to
extreme high. You
quiver in fear, the
fireball burning from
inside out.

Fatality.

Thinkquest Status
[OOO.......................] 2.8%

Food of the Day
DIARRHEA

Colour of the Day
White. Pale Sight.

Word of the Day
Brought to you by Merriam-Webster Inc.

bowdlerize \BOHD-leh-RIZE or BAUD-leh-RIZE\ (verb)
1 : to expurgate (as a book) by omitting or modifying parts considered vulgar
*2 : to modify by abridging, simplifying, or distorting in style or content

Example sentence: Joshua's staff writers felt he was an unnecessarily heavy-handed editor and complained that he bowdlerized their articles almost beyond recognition.

Did you know?
Few editors have achieved the notoriety of Thomas Bowdler. Bowdler was trained as a physician, but when illness prevented him from practicing medicine, he turned to warning Europeans about unsanitary conditions at French watering places. He then carried his quest for purification to literature, and in 1818 he published _The Family Shakespeare_, a work in which he promised that "those words and expressions are omitted which cannot with propriety be read aloud in a family." The sanitized volume was popular with the Victorian public, but literary critics denounced his modifications of the words of the Bard. Bowdler applied his literary eraser broadly, and within 11 years of his death in 1825, the word "bowdlerize" was being used to refer to expurgating books or other texts.

*Indicates the sense illustrated in the example sentence.

0

Confinement Self Sought

Confinement self sought
A healthy way to live, not
Staying home all day
and night's the way
to avoid being caught
in the midst of fraud

Confinement self sought
A bunch of stupid lot
who does everything but
step out from the hut
in search for life's vault
Instead, stays at home to rot

Confinement self sought
An infection so strong it made you forgot
the wonderful times you had
when you were still a handsome young lad

Confinement self sought
What a scary thought

Pompous Colours

Red as in meat, lean with wine
Takes a royalty to enjoy such dine
so fine

Black as in tar, covered with soot
Oh what a reflect, in a bad mood?
How rude

Blue as in face, body and leg
You're bruised, or was it just a fake?
How sick

Green as in hat, grass yellowish
You're mad, or are you just famished?
What glibberish

Brown as in sand, soil and all
You crawled in though the restaurant door
Everyone stared in awe

White as in shirt, stained with blood
You laid on the floor full of mud
Oh. A retard!

**********

If anyone of you understands Pompous Colours, write me and tell me about it. Tell me what you think it means.

Thinkquest Status
[OOO...........................................] 2.6%

Food of the Day
Delifrance tuna sandwich and Mocha.

Colour of the Day
Pompous Colours. A mixture.

Quote of the Day
"People are like stained-glass windows. They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in, their true beauty is revealed only if there is a light from within." - Elizabeth

0

Interest Revisited

I had a dream
of being a writer who
writes all sorts, from
short stories to novels, poems
on and on

Lost opportunities,
a silly mistake on my part to
select the dreadful path of a
historian. Literature, we
had to part

Interest revisited
when Junior College life embraces and
made known to me friends who
simply loved writing,
addiction rules

Now that I'm back
from the hulk of my writings I
present my very first poem, tasteless
as it seems, encompasses all
my feelings.

Derailed

True bitterness you tasted when
you realised you were off track
entirely. The problem lies not
in lifting your pen
but in the enthusiasm which you lack
completely. Solace is what you sought
for desperately but sad to say,
prayers unanswered, your books beckoned
for your return, much to your dismay.
Oh how much have you slackened?
Enough to paint the white clouds grey,
or so you guessed. The sky darkened
suddenly, bolt of lighting so bright
it blinded. Rain trickling down your face
so slippery, you waited for the light
to guide you to your very base,
back when you were so vitalised, vigorous
and so valiant as to fight
even losing battles oh, so numerous.
Of course the light never came close,
not enough for you to feel the power
needed to complete your prose
falling off the desk as you cower
at the little corner of you own...
Nobody bothered to hear you moan...
or groan as a matter of fact.
Sin sullenly sown.

**********

Erm... puke if you want to. I will understand. If you think otherwise, mail me and tell me about it.

Thinkquest Status
[OOO...........................................] 2.6%
Did the Dutch version of the main page

Food of the Day
The Day's not over.

Colour of the Day
Black. Again. Oh well.

Quote of the Day
"A dreamer is one who can only find his way by moonlight, and his punishment is that he sees the dawn before the rest of the world." - Oscar Wilde